2014 goals and the triathlon lifestyle

This post has been percolating in my head for weeks, if not months. Pieces of it would come and go with no thread to hold them together. I wasn't ready to put the thoughts "to paper", so they stayed in my head. Bouncing, growing, changing all the while. Most times I was too busy to flush them out, some times I was too tired to make sense of them.

This triathlon thing has gone from a weekend warrior hobby to my lifestyle. Not a day goes by without me scheming and plotting about the next big race, a PR, even a minor training goal. Each week is planned into a Google calendar, each day roughed out by the hour so I can fit everything in.

So many things change when you've lived like this a few years. How can I sum them up in a blog post? How to I convey to anyone (including myself as a reader years from now) how this all feels?

Well let's not get too overwhelmed by all these thoughts. Let's start with how I'm feeling right now about 2014.

Lifestyle goals started this year:
Be more active. Doesn't that sound funny? I'm running 50+ miles or training 12+ hours a week and I'm looking for more activity?! I'd read that even leaning against a wall can rest the legs. Advice I took too literally, and got into the habit of investing the 1-2 hrs/day of training followed by being off my feet as much as possible in the remaining hours. Another Bee Binary, I guess: All Or Nothing.

In mid-2013 I started incorporating activity into my weekdays. I started commuting by bike again. I added stair climbs when I could. Working on the 7th floor of a building gives ample opportunity! Sometimes I'm carrying items not safe for stairs, but when I can I step-step and skip the lift. This was only hard at first, after a few weeks I was still tired but looked forward to the rush of movement.

The other change I made was changing to a standing desk, again as much as possible. This backfired at first. Even though I tried to gradually add hours to the standing day, I did overdue it a bit over the summer and ended up with sore feets. It was likely a combination of bad shoes and too much too soon. While I don't stand as much at my desk space nowadays (the computer hardware is poorly placed, leaving me slightly slouched) I do stand more at other times. (Although I think I'd benefit if I sat more to eat!)

Better sleep. I use heavy drapes to create a dark cave with minimal distractions. And I set an alarm on my phone to act as a reminder to shut down and head to bed. Recently my sleep schedule has been an 8-9 through 4-5 solid snooze-fest. It feels great, and it's better recovery than leaning against a wall!

No Forced Feedings. Another funny. But I've been in the habit of making myself eat what I thought was an appropriate amount of food so I wouldn't lose weight. My body weight has been mostly constant for years, maybe due to this habit. But I'd go to bed so full I'm sick, or eat a breakfast that left me uncomfy for hours. I stopped doing that, and went more by feel. If I missed a meal or ate less, I didn't worry about it. To my surprise I rapidly lost a goodly number of pounds, and I feel better for it all! I'm not wasting away or famished.

Being determined instead of stubborn. A Bee Binary. My fatigue levels and mood generally dictate this - my inability to recognize that my plan is not working for me and that I need a change. Sometimes I get mindlessly wrapped up in whatever is directly in front of me, and I can't change the gears in order to address what is next or more important. I'm getting better at stepping back from a bad Zombie-Brain moment to examine why I'm doing what I'm doing, and how to improve on it. A good example is going to the pool and being dead set on swimming the prescribed sets, when I know I need to step back and do some drills.

Still some work to do on these: Climb 4 stair sets instead of 2 or 3. Get away from the kitchen counter and stretch on the floor. Better yet, get away from the kitchen counter and its uncomfy bar stool chairs and really get the feet up to rest. Set a reminder to not sit for more than 15 mins. Use brief wait periods to stretch the back and arms, walk to see some sunshine instead of sitting. And the Forced Feedings do continue to some extent, one example being the other night when I overate on salmon thinking "I needed more protein".

Lifestyle goals for starting now:
Walk on water: I can go hours at work or home without drinking. So a new goal is to sip from all those water fountains I pass by all day. I tend to dislike water bubblers - cold water, drippy chin, and potential disease - but I can do this. I already am, I started yesterday!

Give me a bigger bowl: My biggest problem in cooking is that I always grab a bowl or pan that's too small. Or I start working at a bench or counter top too cluttered to work effectively. Or, more to my triathlon point, I set myself up with a tight schedule, messily packed bag, or disorganized plan that keeps me from hitting my training goals without hurry, rush, stress, and loss of either food or time. Instead I should be prepared with both packing and scheduling to give myself enough space to enjoy the time I have and make the most of it.

Dig deep: This is perhaps a duplicate or extension of being determined and not stubborn? But it involves more of the 'Reason Or Excuse' Bee Binary. Like my swim on Monday - I didn't move fast through the morning, didn't want to go to the pool, didn't want to go to work. Why not? Was I poorly fueled? Low on carbs or hydration and cranky? Was I trying to avoid something like cold water? Did I not have an effective plan, did I overreach and overwhelm myself? I'd like to learn to step back and fix things like this, as they can impact on my mood and outlook. Dig deeper and find the real source to avoid that feeling of forcing myself to do something.

Reduce screen time: This one could be hard, as I'm typing this at a screen!! But what I'm really referring to is the useless screen time. Sure I have lots to do online, between my personal goals, Club chores, and work. But I tend to mindlessly browse the web when I'm tired during the late afternoons, when I could be playing with the dog or getting housework done. It seems to put me into Zombie-Brain Mode, it wastes time, and it leaves me standing at the kitchen counter, usually mindlessly eating a meal. So my goal is to just set a reminder to enjoy it a few minutes, then get going. And no walking the halls staring at that stupid phone all the time! I've reduced this lately and I'm liking it.

Finally, and as a build on the above point - Fix mealtime! Oh man this has been a goal for what seems years. I mange-mange through most meals: hurried, surfing, standing, mindless, no plate, sometimes no utensils! Then I get done and can barely remember what I ate. Take this morning's brekkie for example: apple, sweet potato with ghee, piece of chocolate, with coffee and surfing. Then a trainer ride. Then zucchini, pepper, eggs with surfing. Then a bit of portobello mushroom, then picking at some turkey, then picking at some meatballs, then feeling sick...  It's the follow-up picking and manging that gets me. I don't feel satisfied. Oh, and I'm not drinking water during the meal. This sets me up to drink water afterwards, which feels awful on a too-full stomach! This goal sounds so simple, but it must not be because I've set this goal over and over and over, only to fail. Why? Dig deep here... I think it's just a bad habit!

I'm sensing a pattern here...I seem to be wasting a lot of time, and feeling guilty about it. I wake up then sit around and surf. I sometimes slowly move through what was supposed to be a well-orchestrated morning. I get to 2nd brekkie and lose focus. I feel guilty about this and get mad at myself. I get resentful of having to go to work (probably because I can't waste time as much there...). I get tired at work, lose focus, ignore somethings that need to get done, and waste time. I get home hungry and tired, then stand around to eat a meal in a hurry before walking the dog. Once home again I'm still in time-waste mode, I stand around doing more screen time that isn't effective or necessary.

So....it seems a nice coincidence that tomorrow is January 1st and it's a New Moon day. Then 30 days later is another New Moon day. 30 days....get it?! What about a LifestyleWhole30? Just 30 days of putting these new ideas to work so see what I can fix and improve on. I doubt 30 days is enough for a complete overhaul, but it's a great start. I'm not usually the New Year's Resolution type, but I do love me a good challenge, so here goes.

Some specific suggestions:
1. Set the reminders to get up after 15 minutes. Use it to get moving and get re-focused.
2. Change some of the screen time to scheduling and packing time.
3. Walk down the hall or down a few flights to find a water fountain.
4. Sleep in instead of surfing if that's how the morning can be structured.
5. Be honest with myself, and start addressing my slow mornings, Zombie Brains, and bad habits. What's driving them?

OK so speaking of which -- I've been sitting for quite some time (at work, no less!), I need to pee, and there's a water fountain on the way there...

Why are my legs sinking in the water? Things to work on:

Some potential explanations based on some internets research:

Holding your breath underwater causes too much buoyancy in the chest - don't think that's me.
Kicking from the knee, inflexible ankles - probably not me.
Head too high - could be me.
Flexing through the core, aka crossover - could be me.
Pushing down at the front of the stroke - very likely a source for me.

I have a horrible catch. Things I'm reading suggest bending the elbow to a vertical arm position immediately after the arm is extending. Or maybe a better way to put it - considering my "stalling" problem - is to extend and go vertical in one smooth motion.

A nearly WasGonna Swim

STRENGTH 40-45 mins of Back & Biceps and Abs
SWIM 45 mins and 2100y: variety hour of 150-250-350-350-250-150 as 50 swim/25 choice

Today was nearly one of "those" days in which I have things all planned out, but all my plans fall apart. Nearly one of those days. Nearly.

I woke up early as usual, but this time DH was up early too! But he wasn't training, he was preparing for his trip to CA. I hung out with him then went upstairs for some upper body P90X. I wasn't really into it, wasn't feeling the burn, but I was compelled to finish. The plan was to quickly walk the dog, get to the pool, then get to work before 9am.

I finished my glamour training....it was still dark...it was COLD (10F)...so things didn't happen quickly. It was 8:30 before I got out the door and in the first few turns of driving I still wasn't sure. Should I go to the pool now and be done for the day? Or should I get to work, earn that paycheck, and see if I have time to swim later? Missing my swim would be my punishment for a slow morning. Or would it be a reward to not have to swim and be in the cold locker room?

I decided a few turns later -- swim now. Get to work a little later, skip lunch, work a little later, and when I'm done, I'm done for the day. Besides, I don't have to swim the full 2400 yards like the plan says, I can swim part of it and still benefit! I don't have to be ruled by my All Or Nothing mentality!

Thus far my morning was dragging, full of mental sludge and lacking in momentum. But once I jumped into the water it all seemed to melt away. I shortened the WU and thought I'd at least get 30 mins in. But in the end, I finished all of the main set, mixing swim, kick, and pull together with off strokes and drills to break it up and let time just slide by. Before I know it, I'm itching to finish the entire main set and nearly 50 minutes had passed.

The trade-off is that now I'm late for work. But at least I'm in a good mood. I'm smiling, happy, seeing a lot of positives about the day. All it takes is a little drug hit :)

Christmas Week

Monday SWIM 30 mins and 1400? yards; STRENGTH 30 mins upper body
Tuesday BIKE 1hr and 18 mins; RUN 4 miles
Wednesday RUN 40 mins and 4.5 miles
Thursday SWIM 60 mins and 2400y; RUN 45 mins and 5 miles
Friday SWIM 30 mins and 1300y
Saturday BIKE 1hr and 18 miles
Sunday BIKE 90 mins and 27 miles; RUN 6.3 miles in 60 mins

I had debated delaying the start of ironman training until after the holidays, thinking that being dedicated to training would pull me away from family time and holiday activities. I'm glad I didn't, because as this week shows I was able to to balance it all out and still get 9 hours of training in.

The Monday swim is one I forgot about until Friday night! I can't remember what I did, but very slowly I was able to remember that I did in fact get to the pool and swim.

The Tuesday run was in 6F weather. Brrr. Wednesday was an energy burner on Christmas Day up the school road and back.

Thursday was the post Christmas energy burn, the swim at the ILV-YMCA highlighted a swim problem to work on: my legs are dragging too low. The air above the pool was cooler than the water, so much so that I was able to use the cool feeling of the air to detect my feet being above water. Nope, not much even when I tried! I worked through the 400's as 100 kick-200 swim-100 pull, focusing on my legs and stroke rate. The run was on a treadmill so I could do the speed work pyramid: 4 5-min intervals with each interval having a longer hard time.  This felt really good, so good in fact that I repeated the final 1'hard/4'easy interval.

Friday was just a swim for extra time, this was the swim before which I banged my left knee into the bench in the locker room. Ouch.

Saturday as a gorgeous day, but most of it was spent driving back to STL and running grocery errands. So even though it was 60F out (OMG!!) I didn't get the ride outside or even during daylight. I did it indoors right before heading to bed. Sure I could have skipped it, but I had energy to burn and the urge to do it.

Sunday I got a late start, doing cook-up work before the ride, then waiting 2-3 hrs after that for the run. It was cold again, and windy. I never really felt warm on the run to TGP.

Great week! On to week 3!!

First iron weekend

Saturday RIDE 28 miles in 1:35
Sunday RIDE 18 miles in 60 mins, RUN 9.6 miles in 1:44 (9:15 m/m)

The weekend was raining (at times snowy), cold, wet, windy. It would have been a lot to ask to have the first winter weekend be all outdoors maybe, but after yesterday's 65+F weather you'd be silly to not at least hope a little bit...  But no, the warm weather rode in ahead of a major storm system.

Saturday's ride was the first in months (all summer too?) that I've dedicated myself to a 90 min workout of specific goals. The majority of the ride was ILTs and VG sets -- drills and gear changes -- the time goes by fast with that distraction. Then a 30 min even effort time trial, I aimed for the same pace as a ride earlier this week: 9.5 miles covered. This all felt easy breezy.

Sunday was another cold wet day, and ideally the ride would have followed the run. But winter days aren't always ideal. I get up at 4am, the sun doesn't get up until 7am. So I switched the order to ride in the dark a bit. This ride just focused on a steady aerobic effort.

The run was supposed to be only 55 mins (and the ride only 30 mins!) but at mile 3 I was feeling so good I thought about extending to 9 or 10 miles. It was mid-30's and windy, and I was as always over-dressed :)  I did a TGP out-n-back feeling light, fast, strong, and getting excited about the upcoming marathon. It's 5 months away still, but I can be excited!

What are my goals for the marathon? My 26.2 PR is 4:06 set back in 2010! I know I can improve on that, even if it does turn out to be a hilly course. But what kind of PR? This past summer has shown that even without my usual specific goal training plan times I can PR pretty nicely. I'd love to get under 4 hours, but geez that should happen anyway! The two stand-alone marathon's I've done were years ago and conservative. Why not shoot for 3:45 or 3:30?! That's not to say I'll hit that 3:30 goal, but why not think about it?! Well let me re-think about it!! CoolRunning says that's a 7:58 pace. LOL. I'm not sure I'm there yet. A 3:45 is an 8:35 pace. Maybe more do-able?

Or Think Like A Bumblebee...?

The Last Day Of Fall

STRENGTH about 30 mins and Plyos, and 2.5 mins of plank
BIKE COMMUTE 9.3 miles
SWIM 2000y in about 45 mins

This day was like a gift. I woke up to a 60+F degree day and I had only a few hours of work. So I took it! I rode into work for the first time all week and purposefully wore shorts. When I got to TGA, another cyclist came up behind me and asked about 'cross season!! What chatted the next 1-2 miles, I left with a smile at the awesomeness of how commuting opens us up to sharing the experience. Work went smoothly until a coworker pointed out that it was 66F outside, then I couldn't resist. I finished and up and left early.

I didn't get my swim done in the morning as planned, so now I had to work things out so I could get to the pool in the afternoon. We've all seen how this can go, the best of intentions become a WasGonna. Not today. Today was like a gift. I had lots of time!

Puppy and I went to Laf Square for an xmas errand, then the doggie and I walked after I had some grub. Sometimes I eat too much then worry I shouldn't. Sometimes I get distracted around the house and lose too much time. Sometimes I just change my mind.

This is an interesting thing that happens to me. My mind keeps nagging about the swim, gotta go, gotta go, gotta go. I get something like guilt if I don't go. Same for running, biking, whatever. Does this mean I really enjoy this stuff even when I don't feel like doing it? Does it mean I'm just after the next drug hit? Or does it mean I'm so stuck to my training plan that it controls me?

Either way, today I did the Monday swim I missed. 3x200 WU, then 5x200 MS, then a few more 200's. This swim felt good, and I felt particularly fast with the pull buoy tonight. I had a long form, a fast turn over, bubbles seemed to be flying by my ears. I couldn't get the feeling to translate over to the swim, but it's a feeling to work after!

Can I call this a long run?

RUN about 10.6 miles in about 90 minutes

OK first off, time to dust off the Garmin. Second, this felt damned good and I want more!

And yes, I moved the Thursday morning swim to keep spousal harmony and to avoid swimming three days in a row.

LC, EK, DC, DT, and CS on this run. EK and I talked the entire time -- racing, whole30, cross training, and more! Loved it! Mornings like this are like my own FB feed: I get all the news I need and updates and such.

YAY I Swam!!

BIKE: ~40 mins and 12.5 miles
SWIM ~45 mins and 1500y

The bike was the variable gear efforts: 1:20 of medium, :40 of easy, 1:00 of hard gear. These go by fast.

After the bike, I didn't even let myself shower or get fully dressed! I took of the wet clothes then re-dressed in non-work clothes as a way to keep myself from not going to the pool. If nothing else, I would have to go there to shower. It worked :)

Once there, I did my 6x150 WU, focusing on something different each 50. Also did some kick sets in the WU. The MS was supposed to be 600 swim, 600 pull but I knew my arm endurance wasn't up to that. So instead I broke it up into 4x300, pausing at the 100's to let the muscles rest and get focus back. Otherwise I just drill bad, tired habits into the memory. This worked great, I felt smooth and fast with the small break.

Woot!

Gotta ditch the all-or-nothing approach

BIKE 62 mins and 18 miles indoors, with 30 min TT: 9.5 miles
RUN 3.2 miles in about 30 mins, after work

The bike was the easy part. Get up early and do it. But then when I get done I'm wet and cold, so I think maybe I should change clothes first. Then I think it'll we warmer after the sun has been up a few hours.

Then work meeting goes 1 hr long, then mouse work goes 1 hr long. And now I'm sitting around at 3:30pm wondering how my 35 minute goal run is going to go. Should I leave work early for it? Is that fair? Maybe I could head out at 4:30 (which ain't all that early), drop the bags at the truck, and run from the truck. Or I could leave at 4:30, go home and get the dog, and we do the 3 mile loop at TGP. But my then it's dark.

And it's cold.

Oi, it's day 2 of MiTi season and already the excuse demons are rolling out. This isn't The Blerch talking, is it?

I did the run!! Excuses kept popping up as I packed stuff and walked to the truck out of work -- too late, too cold, too dark -- but g*d dammit it's JUST 30 MINUTES. I knew I'd be happy if I did it, I knew it would feel good once I started, and it did! Screw You Blerch.

A Reason, or an Excuse?

STRENGTH: 50 mins, with pushup/chest P90X, AbsX, plank, and some HIIT
SWIM 0.00 yards!

Variety pack morning for Opening Day! At least the strength part, the swim part was a loss.

This morning was my first 2 minute plank. Thank you Siri for counting, and thank you sudoku for distracting.

The swim. I kinda figured I wouldn't get to it. I just don't love swimming enough. But today (and all the mental teasing, worrying, and etc that went with this) showed that I'm good at making Excuses into Reasons Why Not.

It's cold out, it will be warmer in the afternoon. DH's car needs to be picked up and if he can't do it, I will. My work computer was down, so it took longer to prepare lab meeting. And I wanted to be around when the guy came to fix it, so that's why I didn't swim over lunch. I was tired and hungry and cold by the time I got home, so that's why I didn't swim after work.

Excuses. All of them.

I'm serious about this, but apparently not serious enough to swim!

Dec 16 2013 full moon

Here it is!! The Opening Day Full Moon! How cool that my season starts with this looking back at me :)

The 2013 Songlist

Keeping the tradition of an annual soundtrack, here's the 2013 Songlist.

It Just Comes Natural by George Strait "What I was born to do; Don't have to think it through". Maybe an odd one considering the tone and speed (and that I have Flo Rida and Gaga coming up later!), but this one just says it all and I had it in my head all summer.

Keep Pushing by REO Speedwagon "Keep pushing, even if you think your strength is gone". The song of the Potawatomi Race, heard it in the pre-race music.

Party Rock Anthem by LMFAO "Everyday I'm shuffling". Everyday I'm RUNNING! I was shocked when I read the lyrics of this song, never really listened to it for lyrics!

Just Dance by Lady Gaga "I can't remember but it's alright, I'm alright. Just dance." This one ended up on the list after I heard it on the way to a run at Castlewood, then again on the way home. Says it all, just run. With all the hypoglycemic thoughts and cardio-brained moments I have, this song fits right in.

Cruise by Florida Georgia Line "Baby you're a song, you make me wanna roll my windows down, and cruise". Ah, finally getting some good riding in. This was Frea's song for 2013.

Sweet Child Of Mine by Guns N Roses "She's got eyes of the bluest skies, as if they thought of rain". Overhead from the headphones of another runner on a Chubb run with TV, got stuck in my head, and I probably became an annoying trail partner by singing it outloud and by trying to guess which Alvin & The Chipmunks song he had in his.

Have A Nice Day by Bon Jovi "Shining like a diamond, rolling with the dice; Standing on the edge I'll show the wind how to fly". The Song of the the MT50! I had wanted to get red compression socks that I could mark with the smirk, but I'm cheap so I didn't.

Good Feeling by Flo Rida "Got adrenaline, never giving in; Giving up's not an option, gotta get it in". I heard this on the way home from the MT50. At first I though it was Have A Nice Day, but to my surprise it was a song that foretold my 100 miler!?!?! "Stronger than ever, can't hold me down; A hundred miles gunnin' from the pitcher's mound". 

Royals by Lorde "We're bigger than we ever dreamed, and I'm in love with being Queen". Suggested by LC and JF as a theme song for me :)

Monster by Eminem "Seize the moment and don't squander it; 'Cause you never know when it all could be over tomorrow". Many many lines from this song, pretty much all of them hit on the OCD tendencies we have! But I hit a low in my 5 weeks of recovery, became even better friends with some monsters before kicking them out for good.

It's My Life by Bon Jovi "Don't bend, don't break, baby, don't back down". In response to someone asking me, "Is what you're doing healthy?". I won't get all negative on this voice, except to tell them to STFU and live their own life. (A lesson I could learn from too).

Last weekend in the "fun season"

Saturday: 30 miles and 100 minutes on the trainer

And that was about it. I wanted to run or something, but another part of me (probably The Blerch, more on that later) won the argument by insisting there were too many errands that needed to get done this weekend. And it snowed, and the snow turned to ice, and footprint-pocked ice is hard to run on.

And we did have a large number of errands to run this weekend, since the goal was to have xmas shopping DONE by Sunday night. It almost is, so it was worth the push.

There's still a niggle of a thought that I need more rest. Is that The Blerch? Maybe he's inspired by the fact that I now have a The Blerch t-shirt! It arrived in the mail over the weekend. I'm wearing it Monday on opening day.

I had a great rest, really took time off from logging, blogging, emailing, planning, thinking, and the like. So while I'm happy to be lazy for a while, it's time to get back to what we do best around here.

Run faster...it's COLD!

RUN 6.6 miles under 55 mins

As per the fun season rules, no Garmin. And as per a new denial rule, no lookin' at the temperatures. Let's just say it was about 10F!

IT, EK, DT joined for this run. It wasn't bad once we got moving. Heck even after we stopped it still wasn't bad. But we did a fast loop! My knee and hip tendons were starting to hurt - was it the cold, or the lack of running lately? Hard to say.

This is it, the last week "off". I've been doing some strength training 3 times a week, some riding, some running, and of course no swimming. My first trip to the pool will be a remarkable event in that I finally made it to the pool.

Sometimes I remember posts that I started and never finished, like my 8 Rules post. They're in my head, I just never get to them. Time to wrap things up!

2013 wrap up, looking back and looking ahead to 2014

Well I guess it's time to close out 2013 and get the year wrapped up. My Opening Day for the 2014 season starts next Monday, only 6 more days!

2014 is shaping up nicely. Just yesterday I found a spring marathon. About a week ago I found a gravel grinder. I'm already registered for two full iron triathlons, and I'm looking for a spring/summer prep half distance.

2013 was a new experience for me -- I went from 12 hr triathlons to 12 hr running events. The year started off with me and TH running LBL as a prep race, then Potawatomi as our first 50 miler. This was a huge accomplishment, and I think I can say that for both of us. I had doubts on top of doubts about whether I could finish a race like this. But if I knew I could do it, there'd be much less thrill. Apparently, not knowing is what keeps be going.

Once finished with the 50M, I shifted into a somewhat neutral, unmotivated state. (Originally 2013 was going to be a fun off year for me. That didn't happen! Well I was off triathlons and doing something new, so I guess maybe it did happen!). So imagine my surprise when I realized I wanted to try 50M again later that year at the Mark Twain.

TH sat this one out and focused on tri's and resting. So my new training partner became TV. It took some adjusting, his pace was faster and his approach more inter-competitive. He was out to win many of his races. TH and I had a more intra-competitive in that we only competed against ourselves, not others. (And that's not to say we competed or compared against each other.) So suddenly I'm not only going faster than I'm used to, I'm also talking strategies and higher goal setting. At first I didn't know if I liked it since I've been participating in these events mostly done this for fun and personal challenge. How would the experience change if suddenly I set goals of fortune and glory? Would finishing 2nd be a "loss" for me? Will I still feel embarrassed by admitting a goal of "I Wanna Win"? Could I be happy with an otherwise great race if I didn't podium?

I've been doing this since 2006, so this was my 8th year of racing. Sure, I've been podium-hunting at some events. But it wasn't my major overall goal. So maybe it's time I start setting bigger goals, start looking beyond the MOP finish, and start pushing myself much harder.

July's Rt 66 half iron came and went, leaving me with a 2nd AG finish and a 13.1M PR. This was my first taste of that fortune and glory -- I set my sights on a woman ahead of me in the last mile of the best half-mary I've ever run and went after her. No shame. And no dice, she beat me. But I enjoyed the thrill, congratulated her, and noted the lesson learned: I'm not only stronger than I think I am (learned in Redman 2009), I'm also faster than I think I am. (Though I'm still not terribly fast, if you take my meaning).

Next up is the Mark Twain 50M. I spend a majority of the race wondering about my position in the women's field, but don't find out until days later that I won 3rd! Although ultra running doesn't grant 3rd place podiums (it's First or Finish), I'm pretty damned proud of this.

But every time someone asked, how was your race?, I minimized my accomplishment by saying "I had a 2 hour PR and finished third, expect there's no 3rd in ultras".  I just couldn't help myself, that's what I'd say. Was I still feeling ashamed about shooting for a podium? Why do I feel that way? Was I thinking I'd failed myself somehow? I've had years of thinking "it's not where you place or your time, but rather how well you executed your race plan" and I was happy with whatever place I finished in. Now I'm thinking "execute the race plan in order to podium". Is it really so different? No!

So one more race -- the McNotAgain 30M. I was doing this for "fun", I said. But deep down I wanted a redemption for the mess of a race I'd had at Potawatomi. (If I measure the success of a race by execution, that was a win/lose. I had a poor nutrition execution, but a winner of a fix for it in that I made myself walk it out). Prior to the race, I was scoping the other registered females online, looking at race times, ages, and experience to measure against my own. Things were looking good for a front finish, assuming my execution was as planned. And it was! I won first overall female and capped off my best year running ever.

But afterwards, I still felt awkward saying I'd won the race! My biggest win to date and I'm still hedging it.

Where does this leave me for 2014? I'm setting big goals.  I'm thinking that spring marathon might be a good opportunity to really push for a marathon PR. And I Wanna Win at MiTi. Oh yes, there, I've said it. Not the first time I've said it, but now it's 'on paper' so to speak and I'm gonna dial it up for next year. It's leaving me somewhat apprehensive and nervous about starting the training.

But if I knew without a doubt that I could do it, then where's the thrill?

Turkey Trot Times Two

RUN to race 1.0 miles :)
RUN 5K 27:05
RUN 10K ~57-58 mins, I heard the course was long at 6.7 miles

This was a highlight to Thanksgiving--a back-to-back Turkey Trot! This was new for me, but how hard can it be, right? A grand total of 9.3 miles of racing!

The time between McNot again and the Trots ... hmmm that sounds bad ... Turkey Runs ... so does that ... Turkey Races was spent taking seriously the needed downtime to recover from 2013 and to prepare for 2014. I have one month of rest before I start up again. I'm trying to ignore studying the plan and calendar, avoiding logging anything, and most certainly not pushing myself to do anything I really don't want to do.

So there's some easy runs, one or two swims, a few indoor spins to report. Or not report, as there's nothing to say about them.

One to share is a group run on the L&C trails--I showed up anxious about being late and translated that in to a relatively fast loop of the long trail. It was a good group that probably could have dropped me if they wanted to!

Back to the races. I'd been "off" since the Saturday trail run, mostly traveling and sitting. New York's forecast was low 20's and snow, certainly a change from what I'm used to! The Blerch was telling me it's too cold to run, so I had this nagging temptation to skip out. And my plan to run the 0.9-ish mile to and from the race was almost preempted by  the rental car not wanting to move that morning. As I sat in the car waiting, The Blerch came back, pointing out that it's cold and it's not nice to leave the hubby alone with this problem. I wanted to run, but not be cold! Oh HFTU.

It was a short run to the race, but then just over an hour wait to the start. WU then CD almost. When the 5K did start, huge puffy flakes were falling, backlit by a partly cloudy sky. Migrating birds flew overhead in a V-formation. The wind was blunted in our little pre-gun penguin huddle. A few calm and pretty moments right then. :)

My 5K goal was just run, not race. The crowd of 2000 or so was full of walkers and all paces, and the streets were barely cleared of the 4-6 inches of snow. It wasn't long before the pretty snow turned into a chilly slush that filled my shoes. By mile 2 my toes were numbed, a tendon? was pained in my left foot, and The Blerch was considering skipping the 10K. Aside from a rude pink-cancer-shirt-wearing-runner, the race went great.

I had 12 minutes between races, which I spent with my cold bare feet over a heater. I slipped small sammich baggies over my socks to keep the wind off my toes. Why didn't I do this for the first race?

My initial goal for the 10K, made back in the snowless midwest, was to try for a PR. Not gonna happen here. Although the crowd was much smaller at 450, and overall the field was more competitive, the roads were still slushy and for 1 mile not even cleared. So I aimed for a solid run, good pace, and just enjoying the snow-covered trees, rural roads in the course, the cold air, and the common group-effect of a race like this :)

The day warmed up to 32F by the finish, my toes didn't suffer the 2nd race, and DH came to give me a ride home. I think I'll end 2013 here, with a few more days off and a month of fun running to end on.

McNotAgain 30 miler race report

RUN 30 miles in 5hrs 53 mins, 1st OVERALL!!

[A few weeks later I'm still waiting for official lap times and results. Athlinks has what looks like 11 womens in the run, but me as the 2nd overall and 14/14 from my AG...so ImaGonna quit waiting and post this]

Spoiler alert--I WON!! That feels awfully weird to say.

I had three goals coming into this race: don't get injured, get under 6 hrs, and win it. And I mean win it all.

For the days leading into the race, I kept having bad visions of injury. Breaking an ankle on the course, falling, something that would require rest and recovery and ice and maybe even worse. All mental tricks.

On top of that, I fully admit to scoping out my competitors (all 7-8 of them) to see what their history was. I was feeling good, things were looking good...

It was odd to be returning to the race without TH, but via email and mental replay I had contact with her. So imagine my SURPRISE when I sit up in the truck (where I was resting prior to the race, avoiding the crowds of friends milling around the site) and see a SLTC logo walking towards me!! She drove up to surprise me! This totally made my day, and changed my mood entirely. I went from having no one to share it with, to having someone to look forward too :)

It was the perfect day weatherwise: sunny, some winds, low 40's at the start. Leaves were on the trail, but not so much that I couldn't see the trail under it. Pre-race prep moved along (with TH keeping me on task) and it wasn't until we'd lined up that I realized the runners were facing backwards at the start line. We were running the course BACKWARDS! Well that changes my mental course movies.

The course is 3 10-mile loops, with an aid station at about mile 5. The first 5 miles are hilly but less so than the last 5 miles.

Lap 1: 1:58 (was closer to 1:55 but had to include wait at porta potty)
The first loop started off with some struggle to find a pace. I've learned this is normal for me. I have lots of energy, I'm anxious to go, but my energy flattens out after a few miles and I get a bit of "OMG I have a looong way to go..." unease. Moments of "I can't do this", "I'm too tired", and "What was I thinking?" start rolling through my head. I've learned to run through it.

So I settled in during these first miles, trying to remember the course in reverse. I was able to identify most landmarks and hills from April. The meadow loop near the end, the squeeze between the trees, the steep hills up from the creek, the graveyard. It went pretty fast and soon enough I was at the AS. After some confusion on my part on how to exit the AS and get back on trail, I entered the really hill portion of the run.

These hills were much easier to remember! They are hard to walk, let alone run. So I walked, as did everyone else around me. I was coming up on the 10 mile runners and enjoying their company, knowing that would be gone in the next loops. Difficult, but pretty--that's how I would describe these miles. The leaves were yellow, then brown, then orange, then yellow. Down to the flats, up the hill, around the bend, back to the flats, over a small creek, up Leafy Gulch (FeeLee today!!), over the major creek (stayed dry), over the sand, up to Totem. Around Totem and through the big, crunchy, papery leaves, and back to start after a few more minor creek crossings and hills. The meadow loop was much longer than I remembered, then TH was at the top of the last hill! She helped me move along through the lap and get back out the door.

Lap 2: 2:00
I had some stomach upset at the beginning of this lap, and I'm not sure why. It might be the HR excitement of seeing the lap go by; it might be the all soft foods I ate the past 24hrs; it might be too hard of a pace? But I'll be honest here, and admit that I suspect it was a bolus of adrenaline at TH's update that there were 2 women about 5 minutes ahead of me. My mind races--3rd place?! Can I make up 5 minutes?! Stress stress stress!!

Let it go. Re-adjust the goals. Run MY race, see what happens. Twenty miles to go, way to early to get my head worked up over that. But I was still disappointed in what I thought would be a non-first finish.

I let it go. I re-adjusted to focus on the sub 6 hr goal, and not getting injured.

Once I did this, I settled back in. For most of the first 5 miles I didn't see another runner so it was a boost to see people at the AS. I half-filled the Camelbak here, used the first hill to work out the air bubbles, then settled back in, cheered that I was half way done and feeling awesome.

It was around mile 17 that I thought I saw another woman ahead of me, not certain it was a woman but that was my guess. Realizing that I was catching her, I figured I'd go by her soon enough. But she disappeared from the trail after a minute or so. Bathroom break? Off course? Was I imagining things? There was some grumbling in the first lap about some areas of the course being hard to follow, and this course would be easy to cut if you knew how.

And suddenly I'm back in negative-head land, grumbling that if this woman beat me because she cut the course, I'd be pissed. I didn't even know if it was a woman, if she lost the course, or anything at all! Let it go!

Then near Totem I came across a pie-plate arrow backwards, meaning I run up behind the arrow. NUTS. Off course! Stop. Think. Look. (Maybe I should have Looked and Thought earlier before going off course). I knew where I was, I could see the horses and recognized the area. So I went backwards on the course to find Totem, walked around Totem to "make up the distance" I missed, then set back out on the course. Relieved, but feeling a little guilty about the cut. This really put my mind back right regarding the "other woman" I thought I saw earlier.

Back to the meadow, up the hill, forget to tell TH all the things I wanted to tell her, refill the Camelbak, back out for Lap 3. Her update: "a woman was 5 minutes ahead".

Lap 3: 1:50-ish
Wait, did TH mean ONE (1) woman was head of me. Or did she mean of the women ahead of me, the closest one was 5 minutes? Either way dammit, the same 5 minute lead, meaning we were on the same pace. For me to catch her, she'd have to make a mistake in pacing or nutrition. More mental stress. Let It Go.

By now, with only 10 miles to go, I was more willing to push my pace. I knew 10 miles was easy, but I held to my initial plan of holding on to a safe pace until mile 25. At that last AS, I got more water, another boost, and some peanut butter nutella rolls (sadly wrapped in flour tortillas, of which the squirrels became beneficiaries). Five more miles. Open it up, and go-go-go. I was feeling so good at mile 25 that I wondered if I was being too conservative. Through miles 25+ I was passing people, one after another. It's a boost to pass people who are walking as it makes me feel faster, and I always wonder what it took to reduce them to a walk late in the race. Poor pacing? Injury? Cramps? Whatever, it validated my conservative pacing early on.

I caught sight of the woman ahead of me coming up into Totem, which by the way was marked by pink tape and I just missed it before, and I could see that I didn't cut the course by much (if anything I probably added to it). How did I know it was a woman? Pink hat, green top, pink sports bra, pink compression socks, and a black/rainbow cheetah print tight. She was easy to see. And she was walking up hills.

Hills were a focus of my training for this race, and it was time to make use of it. I followed her through Totem and passed her shortly after we returned to the single track. It seemed odd that as I approached she didn't look back, even when I called up to her, and I found out why: loud music in headphones. I'm sorry to say I scared her! But that's not my problem now. My problem was to make solid my pass and leave her well enough behind me so I didn't have to worry about her coming up behind.

With 2.5 miles more to go, my HR elevated and mind racing, I set out to run the last miles fast. A few peeks over my shoulder showed the pass was solid, and now I was looking ahead for the other female. I had nothing to lose at this point by going too hard! So I did, watching the Garmin for my sub-6 goal and not seeing anyone but men ahead of me.

Around the meadow, up the hill (gotta love a race that ends with a hill like that), a "Yay For Sub 6" to TH, a joke about having enough time for a bathroom stop, then FINISH!

It wasn't until a race volunteer came up to me as I was coughing and leaning on my knees that I realized my placing. When he handed me a post with two signs nailed to it, I was initially confused. But he and TH explained -- I WON! OMG. I took the post and fell to my knees. I'm so HAPPY TH was there to see that, and there to share the morning with me. It would have felt so ...empty... otherwise.

Also if she wasn't there, I wouldn't have walked around, ate something, and rested. Haha, she jokes about Momming me, but I need it!

This was the best way to end my 2013 season--on top with all goals hammered down tight. Oh yeah, 2013 was ultra-cool.

Taper Dammit!

RUN 4.25 miles in 39 mins

More rain! A very light rain this time, almost not there, with more gray skies and fading fall colors.

The run started out good but around mile 3 I felt it fading. My legs were heavy and I was tired. Here I am days away from my race and I'm tired?!?!

Hit hard by the time change

SWIM 2500y in just over an hour
RUN about 38 mins and 3.6 miles

While most clocks were updated to the new fall/winter time, someone didn't tell the doggie. So she woke me up at 3:53 this morning and I couldn't get back to sleep. I was meeting RM at 8am at the pool, so this was early! But I'm always finding things to do, I didn't see it as a total loss just yet.

But then a weird brekkie that included 3 big mugs of coffee happened, soon enough I was wide awake and sleepy at the same time. I tried to fall back asleep but it didn't happen. I had a buzzing, disconnected, sick, blah feeling. Driving out to the pool, I was unfocused and thinking this training would be a bad idea.

But I'm a sucker for peer pressure, and just thinking about having to "call in sick" didn't appeal to me. So off to the pool!

Once at the pool I forgot to bring in my swim plan, so on the fly I made up a 2x [300 swim, 300 pull, 6x50 drill, 100 paddle] then 500 whatever plan with kicking. I worked through it, trying to slow the heck down and find good stroke technique. I'm not very good at that!

Then the run was a bit later with RM and Daisy. We ran from his home to a favorite park, and in doing so I realized that a group run that rotated through friends' neighborhoods and favorite parks would be a fun series to do. For me anyway.

I was very tired yesterday after all that RBRB, and then with this morning on top of that (or more likely because of it!) I'm worn out. I need to rest!

Sammich!

RUN 29 mins and 2.8 miles
BIKE 2hrs and 28 miles
RUN 60 mins and 5.5 miles
BIKE 75 mins and 23 miles (indoors)

Why am I doing all this training? Cuz it's FUN!

RM is two weeks out from IMAZ so this was his last big weekend. I'm one week out from McNot Again, so it's my last big weekend too. But did it need to be this big?

I was excited to just spend a majority of the day being outside and doing something. I admit to moments at the start where I wanted to chicken out and not bike. It wasn't COLD, but it was cold--mid 40's. And windy! Maybe the wind was the part scaring me off?

I'm happy to say I didn't scare off :) The original plan of doing a 2nd 2hr bike outdoors didn't pan out for any of us, but it's even better because after RM and I got home we kept going (but didn't know what each other was doing!) on the trainers indoors.

Now that I'm signed up for B2B, this was a great way to start the year leading into it--on a ride that might just mimic the windy and cool conditions for that race.

2014 B2B

I'm signed up! On the first day of registration too. You'd think I was excited or something.
WHOOP!

Happy Halloween!!

RUN 6.1 miles in ???

The Garmin didn't make it, it died around mile 3.

This wasn't with the normal Thursday group. It was raining pretty heavy and still dark out. When you're building to a race, it's easy to convince yourself to run no matter what. When you're the only one of your friends building to a race, it's hard to convince them to run no matter what. So no group run this morning, DH doesn't like me running alone in the dark. I don't blame him!

But the mid-60's weather, foggy rain, and outstanding fall colors were too strong of a pull--as soon as a few rays of light hinted at dawn I was out the door. I was wet within minutes and to my surprise pretty warm too! It was beautiful!

Some of the trees glowed a bright yellow, red, or orange against a flat gray misty sky. Normally you don't notice one particular tree as you run by, but today certain ones were fantastically glowing. If I could have taken pictures I would have!

And so ends October. My race is now 10 days away! This run felt great, fast and strong. But technically I'm tapering too, so I resisted the pull for more mileage and went home.

indoor bike

BIKE 1:12 and 21 miles, 12.5 mins on then 2.5 mins rest
COMMUTE 6 miles bike

I realized at some point recently that I've done the vast majority of my biking indoors this year. That's kinda sad. OK yeah I do my midweek riding early before dawn, and that's been the bulk of my bike "training" this year, but still I think that Frea was a very minor player this year for mileage. Puppy probably has more miles than Frea! And trusty old Bird has been indoors all summer.

I had grand plans of doing a century this October, but my biking didn't bounce back after a summer of ultra running. As I've said before, bike training helps my running but not vice versa.

Those few times I did put too many miles on the trainer I could feel that pez animus left knee injury lurking--the same injury I had last April after my ankle injury pushed me indoors on the bike.

Another grand plan for this year was planning a long trip up towards home on the bike, approximately 220 miles of rural roads this fall. Obviously that didn't happen either.

I did what I needed to do this year to meet my goals, and next year I'll do the same. Still it's a sad thing to realize how much I rode indoors this year!

Fall of rain, and leaves!

SWIM: 2400y in about a hour, sets of 400 different ways
RUN: 7.5 miles in 1:08, 9:04 m/m pace in FoPa

The morning swim was supposed to be a little earlier morning (I ended up getting there around 8am!) but I was slow to leave the house. The "training plan" I'm "following" in my new little book called for and Endurance Form swim, so I picked the one I was gonna swim last Friday and went with it.

Saw D at the pool for the first time in months! Then focused on my swim. As always I start off feeling great but my form degrades as time goes by, especially as a set gets longer. Today was 400's in different ways: 8x50 drills, 400, 2x200, 400, and 4x100. I was OK with the shorter sets, it was the 400s that suffered at about the 300y mark. And that's not surprising! I don't have the muscular endurance for it yet.

But my form would get awful, and at some point I'm drilling in bad habits. Some reading I did later in the day suggested avoidance of the long sets for this exact reason. Problems I'm noting: my head swivels left and right, my left shoulder drags in the water (off balance rotation), my catch is non-existent, and my timing is such that I "stall". I've looked at more swim toys like ankle bands and beeping-tempo devices to improve front quadrant swimming and cadence, respectively, but at what point do these tools go from help to hinder? Probably at my level, anything is a help.

The run was also going to be earlier, but since my swim ended around 930 I decided to get to work instead and run over lunch. I was also hoping to catch some rain on my run, but it happened that by the time I ran I had only a light rain. The plan was 4-5 miles but I was feeling good, the weather was perfect, the leaves and fall colors were bright and beautiful...nothing like work! So I did the FoPa loop instead of the planned out-n-back.

I went without my Garmin to keep the run casual instead of paced, but instead I spend the run wondering my mileage. Would it be this? I skipped that, what would that have added up to? Is this going to be an even number?

I would have guessed 6.9 miles, but MMR says 7.5. Whoop!

Bees at the RnR STL

For my birthday, I wanted to cheer a corner of the RnR STL as it passed by our house. Because cheering in a costume is more fun with friends, we made an event of it. Between the iron bee, basset bee, banana, santa, pinata, and others--I had an awesome morning!! I love this stuff!

Thanks to my DH who puts up with me and my crazy friends, and cooks us bacon and eggs :)

Last long run, last miles FAST

RUN 17.1 miles in 3hrs 10:30 something pace
RUN 5.9 miles in 50 mins 8:20-something pace
Total of 23 miles in 3:50

This was really one long run, but was broken into two very distinct segments. My original plan was a long trail run with TV, but since both of us have nagging mild pains that could become injuries we changed plans. He at least stayed home to rest. Me? Nah. I ran. A lot.

The first 3hrs with RM and BS. This was BS's longest run evah! And I think RM's longest training run evah! I remember those days, I still have them, but they are fewer and far between. This segment was super casual, talky, and fun. I LOVE these runs--social but with a goal to keep it serious. I kept drifting ahead of them towards the end, BS was less talkative and hurting. RM 's injury was holding off (with some Rx help). My knee was hurting but not enough to stop me. More of an ache than a pain.

I sipped my EFS, probably didn't drink enough, and really enjoyed the time. Great conversation that covered everything from Club business to the symphony, to orbital trajectories. I laughed to think we were out there long enough for the trees to change between the first and last loops.

The 2nd segment was alone. I was at 17 miles and thought I'd just out-n-back to round up to 20. But when I hit the halfway point I didn't want to turn around. So I didn't, figuring I could make a zoo loop. But when I hat that split point I didn't want to go left to the zoo. So I didn't, figuring I could just hit the next hill then go left. But I didn't. Why?

Because I was having the damnedest awesome last few miles to a long run!!! I was clocking 8:20 ish miles to my surprise. But the real boost was the feeling--I felt STRONG, FAST, FRESH, I felt the PUSH I want to feel the last 6 mile of a marathon. In my mind, I was running MiTi and closing the gaps to competitors. It was as if these were my first miles of the day, like the first 3hrs didn't happen. Amazing.

It was hard to stop, I could have kept going, but to no gain. I walked instead and marveled over what just happened. The rest of the day my energy was phenom. No crash until late.

My knee? Ached during and after. Hurts to kneel on. And late in the day after bending it felt a sharp painful twinge. See what happens tomorrow.

Short weekend, so rode today. And signed up for MiTi!

BIKE 18 miles in 1hr, indoors.  23 min intervals (2 min rest)

I would have loved to do the 2hr ride I had initially planned, but a full workday and a trip to the vet kept that from happening.

I signed up for iron distance #4 today. 303 days until the Michigan Titanium!

Happy Birthday
to me.
Nine months of
training!

Oh oh sometimes, I get a good feeling :)

"Birthday" run

RUN 6.4 miles in 1:05

This was my "birthday" run. Not actually on my birthday, but this was the day I'd get to see my friends so that's when I celebrated it. A few extras showed up! RM with D and BS. Yay! I ran with RM and D the Endurance Dog.

We had bacon and bee pops (they looked like mutant flying cows) afterwards. When people ask what I'm doing for my birthday, I'm so happy to say spending it with friends. I have the greatest!

Midweek long run

RUN 10.4 miles in 1:40

This was a run commute into work. Yeah, it's a little longer than my actual commute, musta got lost on the way in TGP. This felt great, not outstanding and not a drudgefest.

My knee is doing OK. It hurts, but I'm not limping or debilitated or hesitant to run.

Tuesday Two-fer

BIKE 1hr and about 18 miles, 8 min "on" intervals
RUN 29 mins and 3 miles, commute home

This is one of those days in which it almost didn't happen. The training, I mean. The plan was to get up at the usual 4:45am, be on the bike at 5:30, off the bike at 6:30, and done running by 7:30, shower-eat-walk-dog and out the door by 8:30am. The best of plans...

...until my doggie wanted "out" at 1:38 and I had trouble falling back to sleep. When the first alarm went off I didn't get up. The backup alarm at 5:23 did wake me up, although I didn't get out of bed. Hmmm...It's OK it's kinda the off season, right?

I was on the bike by 6:28, dressed to run by 7:35....and I look at the weather. Light rain and 39F! What!? Suddenly the combination of poor weather and late schedule confuses me. I try the mental math and fail. I decide to shower now and run later. I can run during a break at work or run home at the end of the day.

By the end of the day, I was getting hungry and thirsty. When I dressed to leave, it was raining again. I can't complain about how pretty it was to see from work--the bands of rain falling over the east as the sun set and the sky was changing colors. The temp was 60F--lovely!

Then as I'm walking to the car, I see the wind whipping the trees and driving the rain into the windows. I start having doubts. Then I start having the HTFU talk--It's only 30-freaking-minutes! But it's windy...HTFU...but it's wet...and maybe cold...OH HTFU.

Happily I did run home, and unlike many of my late afternoon runs this one felt great. The rain was light and transient. At one moment there was light rain falling with the sun peaking through some clouds. The rain drops glittered as they fell. To think I almost missed this!

Midday Monday swim

SWIM 1hr 2550y, more short intervals and some T-pace testing

It was supposed to be a Monday morning swim, but I'll take what I can get. Especially when it comes to swimming. And can you believe the two lap lanes were busy? More believable was the fact that the swimmers weren't "swimming" they were more of the splash'n for fun types. One woman was into a workout, the others...well they were working...but I wouldn't call it working out, if ya know what I mean.

The plan today was more short intervals, again to build my muscular endurance for swimming. The cardio side is just fine, wind me up and I can go all day. But me ME....eh, needs work. And that's not even getting to my technique.

I did some in-swim mods to the sets once I realized that a 300+200+100 could become a 300+300 T-pace test as outlined in my new swim book. The book says to do 3x300 in succession, and swim even times across the three to get an average 300 time. I only did 2x300, and in all honesty I don't know if swimming a 3rd would have helped my average.

The first was 6:04, the second was 6:05-6:06. When I refer back to the book and scan the column for my time, I find I'm at the BOTTOM of the chart. The chart ends at 6:00. I'm off the charts!!! And NOT in GOOD WAY! Wow. Well, no where to go but UP.

Easy 10 at Castlewood

RUN 10.1 miles just under 2hrs

So my knee. It hurt all last night, and only a little this morning. It came and went during the run, and after a pause to let some cyclists by really hurt the last mile. Then *poof* it's gone and feels fine. I'm more convinced that I have some muscle/soft tissue imbalance or laxity that is pulling the patella off-track.

That's my professional opinion ;)

What a gorgeous day, and I was all talkative. With DH still out of town, I guess I just let loose when I get the chance. My poor running partner.

Knee was fine the rest of the day, again the on/off/on pain but nothing as pained as Saturday night.

Run Swim Bike... This is a rest weekend?

RUN 9.8 miles in about 1:35
SWIM 2300y in 1 hour
BIKE 10 miles in about 35 mins

I was going to run longer, but I was having pain in my left knee since the Thursday run. It's only when I bend my knee, it's focused on the  lower lateral side of the patella, doesn't hurt when standing with weight or just sitting. Bending the knee while walking, stairs, those hurt. It's a sharp focal pain, but sometimes I get the sense that it changes location a little. Sometimes the bottom of the patella, even for a while on the left. Is it a patella tracking thing? I can touch it ok, and when I do I can feel something sliding or moving under the skin where it hurts. Is there something out of place? Sometimes it feels like I need to pop my knee. So all day Thurs and all day Friday, knee pain.

Then while going down the back steps last night something with my left foot started hurting. When I woke up this morning, no pain at all. Did it pop back in to place?

I ran just under 2 miles before meeting up with RM in Fo Pa. It was a chilly morning, I wasn't feeling into it or focused all morning. I had that mental fuzz I get from having a late morning deadline. Today was 930. And not only mental fuzz, but too much brekkie. Urp.

By the time I joined up with RM I was feeling better, and after the run I was feeling 100% again. And I'll say here too, even though I don't normally talk about other's training here, that this was the best run RM has done with me. Damn he's improved! I love it! We talked Club, so the loop went fast and we even added on after the first hour! And my knee didn't hurt much at all.

I had plans to swim afterwards. Now many times I'd decide I didn't want to swim. This time I wanted to swim. Yea baby! I picked at mid-distance workout from my new book that had a lot of short sets--50's and 150's. These are nice for me know since I don't have the endurance and focus for much longer. If I try to go longer, my form just falls off. So this is a good place to get started.

After a too-long too-hot shower the pool water was cold. Or maybe it really was cold, because even after an hour I was cold. My form was getting bad so I added in more pull and kick sets. Really the goal was just to get the swim done.

I thought of a new swim tag for me -- Ima learn 2 swim -- or something like that.

After getting home, I wanted to round it up to 3 hrs so I hopped on the trainer. Slight push, but just really just cardiac extension.

And now later, sitting here hours later, my knee hurts again.

Mid week summary post

Tuesday STRENGTH 40-45 mins of Plyos, then RUN 4.2 in 39 mins
Wednesday BIKE 20 miles in 70 mins, 8 min "pushed pace" intervals
Thursday RUN 13.1 miles in 1:55

It's now solidly dark out at the old speedwork time (6am) and our ringleader is injured. So it's likely that speed work is off the schedule until next spring. It's hard to do alone! So Tuesday was plyos then a run in the light rain.

Weds should be my midweek long run but I turned it into a ride. DH was leaving for a trip and I didn't want to be out running when he left!

Thursday (today) started off in the rain but that tapered off fast. I was feeling very good for this run, which probably means I didn't work hard enough yesterday.

I'm excited for so much right now, I'm not feeling any of that pre race fatigue like usual. I've had to rebuild my schedule for the McNot Again to get a build and a rest. I'm using a 10 day schedule instead of a 7 day one now. So 10 days build and 10-ish days of rest. Mostly that means the next Weds will certainly be a run!

I'm also thinking about when to register for my 2014 races! What a silly thing to be planning out :) But I'm thinking on the bday I'll register for MiTi, then I'll do B2B once it opens. I don't want to sign up for #5 as #4, and #4 as #5. Like I said, it's silly.

Finally, I'm trying to find a swim plan for this fall and winter. I really (really times infinity...) need to get some goals and guidance on that sport. I'm so slow that any improvement is an improvement, but as shown in 2012 just doing the yardage is not a recipe for improvement, as I swam the most miles ever that year and didn't speed up any.

Season is changing!

Saturday BIKE 2:20 and 40 miles
Sunday RUN 4:00 and 18.3 miles

Cool temps, a distinct crisp feeling in the air, and a steadily changing display of green to red, yellow, and orange. It all adds up to one thing--fall is here!

Oh fall been here a few days now, but this weekend it settled in. Don't expect anymore warm days.

Saturday I was going to ride with SM and NK, but rain in the forecast kept them indoors (no need to risk injury with their race just weeks away!) for their long ride. I was invited to join their trainerfest, but I said I wasn't that devoted this time of year. Ah...what? Seems I was! I surprised myself by actually wanting to do a trainer ride, so I picked a long aerobic interval session from the ultra plan, popped in a movie (DH's first suggestion of an asian war film failed to interest me, so ROTK instead), and settled in. For the first time all year, I had the HRM with me and watched it--I didn't have set HR goals but I shot for 75% at 100=105 and 75+% at 105-110. Those aren't high, or accurate. I know it's hard to get the HR up on the trainer. Towards the end my left knee started talking--that same pez animus? injury I felt last year. Cut it short and skipped the CD. I noticed afterwards that I wasn't even tired. So was it a waste of time?

JP did IMWC today!! WHOOP I'm so happy for her :)

Sunday TV and I ran Greensfelder with the promise of bigger hills for my McNot Again training. And oh yeah--he found us some hills! I was doing great with them, but had moments of "why?" and "are we done yet". Oh boy. I've had these before, and had to decide: do I keep going and push through it? Do I need to rest (oh the irony, see above)? Am I burning out?

I've been trying to be mindful of how this season ends and how next season begins, paying attention to the few weeks in between. McNot Again is Nov 9, Ultra training starts with pre-week on Dec 16. A precious 5 weeks of probably not much. I think the habit of training will win, and I'll be doing something the entire time. It's OK to go out and have fun, but don't call it training.

Anyhoo, back to my run.

Around 9 miles we stopped by the VC and I face the decision of How Much More And Where. I said I didn't care, where ever we went was fine with me. In all honesty, I think I was bowing out of the decision because I feared that left to my own choice I'd pick the shortest trail to be done faster! After some thinking on this feeling, I realized: I wasn't physically fatigued, I was mentally fatigued.

Thankfully, we kept going. I say that because I was perfectly capable of more than 9 miles and really needed them for this race. By the end, I was having to push myself to run up a hill and I was walking more than before. But I did it, I'm happy with it, and now I have to restructure my remaining weekends--this was supposed to be a rest week!

Another brisk run. Just comes natural?

RUN 10.2 miles in about 90 mins
BIKE COMMUTE 6 miles

I'm pretty bad about logging the commute here, but I've been doing it pretty regularly M-F even if I don't mention it. This past Monday was a miss though, got a ride from DH.

So much for my plan of a nice slow run. Maybe this is my new slow for this distance? My new "casual" pace? Why force myself to slow down then? Sure if it's a longer or more technical run, then slow it down. But otherwise? Run it.

I woke up this morning late--Thank You 5am Alarm for reminding me to get up. Then I find I have a blurbly GI that didn't sound like something that should be taken out for a run. So that decision of Should I, Or Shouldn't I came up. I figured I could always stop as needed, so I texted in "running late" and took off. Good think I did, because in the end there was no need to skip or delay the run.

It's a beautiful day. Oh heck, for the most part every day has something beautiful in it. But today in particular just stood out as wonderfully temperate, colorful, and enjoyable.

Brisk run with some hill repeats

RUN 56 mins and 6 miles

Skipping yesterday's run was a good idea, apparently. Today's run was brisk and more energetic. So from "OMG I think I'm getting sick on Monday" to "Yippee!" on Wednesday. Up, down, up, down. So consistent...

I keep thinking tomorrow's run should be another 10 miles but at a smarter pace than last week's. Should I slow it down and get that low-HR aerobic burn on for 100 mins or so? Or is that the laziness in my talking--that late afternoon, need more carbs, hate sitting here at work voice that says taking a nap right now is the best sounding option. Up, down, again.

This weekend sounds like another long one :) Up.
Which means Monday will be another energy crash. Down.

And I've yet to see the pool this week. I keep saying tomorrow...

Ride, no run

RIDE 18 miles in just over an hour
BIKE COMMUTE 6 miles

I skipped today's usual speed work/quality run and instead stayed home with the trainer. I hate doing it, I have this odd sense of guilt, but I needed it. Yesterday was a long awful day of being so tired feeling and run down that I thought I was getting sick! And on top of that, the P90X push ups workout apparently set off my back cramps and the pain under my right arm. (Haven't mentioned the pain in my right arm here yet, started Friday as a very sharp pain, escalated Saturday, calmed Sunday, ached Monday, OK today).

It's hard to back off, why is that? It's the freaking FUN season!

Had a conversation with someone last night who said what I do "seems unhealthy". Hard to bite my tongue on those. Really? Unhealthy? ME!?!?!

Oh, my aching back

STRENGTH: almost an hour of P90X: chest and back and abs

Oh yeah this past weekend took a lot out of me. Last Thursday or Friday I had lower back "spasms"--not sure if it's cramps or spasms or something in between--but they're back again today.

It wasn't until DH pointed out the P90X that I realized how I set them off again today.

I'm amazingly tired for October. I like and hate it at the same time. On one hand it's satisfying to know I had a great weekend. It's kinda like a hangover for me. On the other hand it makes it hard to focus on work!

And my poor back. Now my shoulder muscles are joining in.

Riding with the wind

RIDE 56.1 miles in 3:15

My goal for this was to just spend some time on the bike in a easy, aerobic paced ride. To enjoy the brand new fall weather, and to just have some me time.

It mostly went that way. A few differences.

I don't know if I can do easy aerobic. Every now and then I'd push into a very short interval, or I'd look down to make sure my speed was "good enough", then I'd lament my "only" 17.something mph speed. In the same thought I'd chastise myself for thinking that way. I had goals, plans for next year, expectations.

That ride I want to do where I leave STL and ride north to my family--would I be able to ride that "easy and aerobic"? Gotta wonder.

The new fall weather was impossible to ignore. Yesterday's run in the relative heat, with shorts, a jog bra, sweat, and rain was so last season. Today was capri tights, light arm warmers, an extra layer, a wet nose, and mild complaints about the cold. Not only cold, but windy. Thankfully the trails are mostly protected from wind, there is exposure but truth be told they are protected. Goodbye summer, Hello fall.

Me time. As JF put it at JP's party last night: Maybe I should listen to music instead of just talking to myself. The topics range and change so far and so fast when I'm alone. Sometimes disjointed thoughts that come and go and come back again a few miles later. I enjoy it, but sometimes I can get pretty negative. Especially when I'm hungry and/or cold, and I was both of those!

Just two weeks ago I noted that I didn't think I was working hard enough for my training. OK so I'm technically not training right now, but this weekend took a good toll on me. And why am I training 10-11hrs a week?! Wow! 39 miles running, 76 miles biking, and 30 miles bike commuting. That last one is not counted in the hours. Wow!

Running with the rain

RUN 3hrs 39 mins, 22 miles

My only companion today was the rain, and although it only rained for about 2 miles it stuck with me the rest of the way. Stuck turned to stank, and...well...you can guess how this ended up!!

I'm not used to lonely long runs. For the past year I've had TH or TV to long run with. And I'm not used to long pavement runs. So I had an odd sort of excited/apprehensive/doubtful coming into this. I had options to run with others--I'm sure EC's friend ran today and I could have gone that way--but in the end it just seemed so easy to run from the house without driving across the county. Besides I had a few errands to run. Ha! Pun intended.

So I started out from the house, wove through the 'hood to look at the street for our upcoming B&B cheering, then around TGP where I saw a 5K start, then by the BG where I saw the start of a festival, to the corner with GJ's where I thought about how to finish landscaping the front yard. Off to the Hill where I enjoyed the hills and where the rain started.

To this point, the run was hotter than expected but not bad. As soon as I left the water fountain on Macklind at mile 8.2 it started raining and it built into a quick, soaking downpour. I loved it. I was smiling, looking up to let the drops hit my face, and splashing in puddles. I could hear the drops hitting the pavement, see the echoes and ripples raindrops in puddles, feel the refreshing touch of water on my skin, and smell the wet dirt. Loved it!

But that was it. In another mile or two all that was left was a few stray drops and puddles. And that heavy, clingy, cool feeling of wet clothes. Ew. Around FoPa, up Wydown and back to FoPa, then to work. I never got hungry so I wasn't eating much. But at the same time I was running low on energy. This definitely contributed to my slow shut down and eventual crash. I was hydrating OK though.

Stop by work, then follow my run commute home. Then CRASH. Usually I have a big meal after a run but this time I showered, hydrated, stretched, then ate. Then to my surprise I found myself bed-ridden and wanting to nap! So I napped!

JP's party was later in the day--I'm so excited for her!! I was loopy and tired at the party, I'm not very awake by 8pm on a normal day. Good think I napped.

10.3 on 10-3!

RUN 90 mins and 10.3 miles

Really, I didn't plan that. I didn't realize the connection until I was in the truck driving home!

The first loop we ran the opposite direction from the usual. Gawds we're crazy people doing these sorts of things! The 1 mile splits here were closer to 9m/m.

The second part (last 3.something miles) I ran with just DC, a half loop in the park. The mile splits here were closer to 8m/m!

Running on the Sun/Riding on the Trainer

BIKE 20 miles in about 67 mins

I watched Running on the Sun (the first hour anyway) while doing a trainer ride. I hate riding indoors like this on a nice day, but it's now dark outside, this does save me time, and it's a more CV-effective workout.

Great movie so far, still don't know how it ends so for once I'll be surprised at the end of a movie :) Still don't think I could do a 100 miler. But you never know!

TGP run

RUN 6.76 miles in 63 mins

My speed work ring leader called in sick, so I waited for the sun to come up before doing an out-n-back to TGP. I haven't run there in some time, so even though it's a well-tread route for me this was sorta new. To change it up, instead of the loop I turned around at 31 mins to come back.

This was the run in which a woman pulled her car through a stop sign intersection into my path. I hope that scratch my ring might have left on her hood lid rusts.

Rescheduling the fall season

So if MiTi is the A race, then the ultra schedule needs to be backed up 9 weeks. This means that instead of starting Feb 17th, I'm starting Dec 9th! 3DoS is definitely off the books.

The plan is to keep going through November, training with the IMAZ group as I can. My race is Nov 9th, theirs is one week later. So my rest starts Nov 10th.

Rest through November, then start up in December. I can sorta start resting now, since the 30M training won't be quite as rigorous as the 50M training was. I can mix in more biking. Maybe even get a swim in!?

Learning more. Am I a quitter? No. I just think I am.

RUN 14.1 miles in 2:15
FUN CX bike clinic!

Ha, first time I've listed FUN as something I did :)

The run was going to be a flattie at FoPa, a rest of the legs and feets without the strain and pounding of hills and rocks. But then I learned about the CX clinic in QP and changed plans. Sure, my goal of 20 miles done in 4 miles loops doesn't sound fun, but I did it anyway. I knew that if I ran FoPa, I wouldn't make the extra trip to QP. I'd just go home. Refer to yesterday's post about not trying hard enough.

The first 2 loops fit my goal of steady. I always forget how steep the hills are in QP (DH and I walked them last weekend with the doggie, got a fresh look at them) and it surprised me a bit to realize how close some of these hills are to Poto! So if I'm going to do the 30 miler in November (and BTW I signed up for this today!!) I need to learn how to run those hills without burning up. So the goal was run the hill without going lactic. I was doing great. I was tired, running good but not pushing it, and going about as fast as I though I could given yesterday's ride and my MT50 recovery.

Then in the 2nd mile of the 3rd loop a guy came up alongside and said Good Pace. We chatted a few seconds, and I expected that he'd drop me and continue on. But we stayed together. Let me edit that--I sped up. He's a new runner, just lost 30lbs, and is running his first HM next weekend. BRR got him running more, he's learning Pose, he's in Hoka's, and it was all new and exciting for him. LOVE IT! He didn't seem excited the same way I did. I loved the Good For You aspect, he was loving our quick pace, the form, the glide down the hills. He was focused on the run. My head was doing it's usual unicorns and rainbows shit.

So we tore up my last 5 miles! I said twice that if he wanted to go on without me he could, and once I said I need to slow down. But he didn't, and I didn't. He's gonna nail his goal of 8 m/m next weekend. Am I'm walking away with another lesson learned: I can push harder. It's there. I just need to tap into to and not be afraid to try.

Which brings me to another lesson. What a weekend. Let's get to the CX clinic. I had many moments in the clinic where I wanted to stop. Not because I was too tired (although I'm sure fatigue fed the desire). My brain was thinking "yeah I just ran a lot and I biked yesterday, so I'm gonna skip these fast laps". Seriously!? Why did I want to quit? Because I was afraid to not do good. I was afraid of going slow. Afraid of failing.

That's stupid, it's like losing the group ride. How do you fail a bike clinic? By QUITTING. I'm happy to report I didn't quit, I did the fast laps. I was passed, many times. But I did it. I have a lot to learn, I had fun, and I'm so surprised at what this entire weekend did for me.

I learned something today! Perhaps a major revelation?

BIKE 4hrs and 62.someodd minutes

Back in the saddle! RM had a long ride which worked with my goal of just getting back on a bike. In my first rides I always have the concern of not having a good bike "feel" just yet, I worry that my lines won't be clean enough, my responses not quick enough, and that I'll pose a threat to other riders. Especially ones in a major race build.

With that in mind I opted to ride the MCTs, my safety route for fatigue and uncertainty. I'm usually riding them in the first rides of the season--not the late ones! But at the same time, I'm usually not doing 50+ rides in late Sept. I'm usually in recovery.

The ride felt great, I was feeling it by mile 50 but the mark came and went and we just kept rolling. One thing that distinguishes rides with RM--talking. He will debate, ponder, and think. Sure we all talk when we can, but he is different in that it's not random conversations and little blurbs of thought. We'll have conversations! That's more of a running characteristic, he's maybe the only one I find it with on the bike.

So lots of thinking here! A few major points, and a perhaps major revelation for myself.

First off. MiTi should be my A race in 2014. I had envisioned 3 ways to approach it:
1. MiTi is the build race into the A race: B2B
2. MiTi is the A race, B2B is the fun birthday race
3. MiTi is an A race, B2B the focused fix-up of any problems in MiTi

See my spacing between the races is close--9 weeks. Not the 8 I thought it was, bonus week! That's not really enough time to recover, rebuild, and taper for a effective A race. 2 week recover, 3 week taper, leaving 4 weeks of fix-it. I see that as a perfect amount of time for a fix it (and better than the 3 I thought I had!) but kinda close if I don't recover in time or have a really rough time at MiTi.

After discussing my PR/OA goal with RM (more on that below), it seems I've decided to go with option 3. My fall-back would be option 2.

My goal for MiTi is to shoot for the stars--an OA podium. In 2013, I would have needed a sub-12 to OA. In 2012 I would have needed a sub 12:46. Do-able.

But last year I wanted a 12:30 for Redman and only did a 13:23. Granted, the OA female did a 12:30, but ya ya ya...off topic. I've often asked myself...why didn't I get my 12:30? I think I might have my answer.

At CM's going away party, I was talking with BE--a talented and fast guy who makes it all seem so easy. He said after his ride today that by the time he got home he was too tired to decide if he wanted to eat, sleep, or foam roll. That struck a chord with me. Too tired to decide. Too tired to decide. Too tired.

Leaving all too/two tired bike puns aside for now...think about that. How often am I too tired to make a decision after a workout? Usually I'm just stupid, craving sugar, and functional enough to find a place to sit and eat. So I'm not too tired, not too burned. I'm OK, just a bit singed. I don't seem to push myself so hard that I am too tired to function.

I can think of workouts in which I was too tired. Monday Master's comes to mind, and I quit doing those. Even after speed work, centuries, and the like--I'm able to walk, talk, and function. I can think of many times in which my training partners (who often come in ahead of me) are wiped and spend the after-ride/run in a daze. Hmmmm....why am I not wiped more often?

I have an undeveloped Theory of Relativity for triathlon that involves the relative effort for a newbie to run 3 miles versus the relative effort for me to run 13 miles. We're at different points on the spectrum, so their 3 can be as hard as my 13, in relative terms. Lost my train of thought a little here (it's only my first cup of coffee...) but I'll come back to this.

So what I'm thinking is...if I were to look back on the IMCDA to Redman training block, would I find myself too tired to function? Why yes I would. I was fatigued beyond what might be considered safe on most days. But that was MENTAL. I was MENTALLY tired. Or was I? Some days I couldn't stay awake. Some I couldn't walk to the parking lot. That fall I was so tired I didn't even bike commute. (Is this the rest period talking? Telling me I don't work hard enough?)

I think I'm not focused enough. I go out and I "do the miles" but do I really, really PUSH IT? No, I don't think I do. My training plan calls for Intervals, Builds, Rests. I just did miles. Plan said so many hours, I did about that many miles or hours but most often skipped the work. I focused on the essence of the workout (long, tempo, rest) but really the meat of it. I always look back at my plan and wonder if I should get a new one. I look right back now and think "I did that plan for IMWI and for Redman, but never really followed it, so I don't need a new one".

I'm hungry. And this year I got a taste for success--podium at Redman, at Rt 66, and an unofficial at MT50. I'm starting to learn that I CAN.

But my I CAN often conflicts with my I WANT. I want to ride with my friends! I want to talk, and sing, and share stories. You can't do that if you are pushing a pace and unwilling to stop at gas stations. I can think of many friends who sacrificed that and succeeded at their goals. I CAN vs I WANT.

What do I want? Decide that, and come back with your answer.

But I think I already have it. I believe I can do more, I believe I can push harder and find more gears. That's what I want!

How much of fatigue is mental?

RUN 6.6 miles in 57-58 mins
COMMUTE 6 miles

When I wake up in the morning, and as I prepare for my workout, sometimes I have a moment of "oh I'm too tired for this" or "I'm going to get dropped, today's not my day". Most of the time I'm just fine, especially if I'm with a group. It leads to that "I'm stronger than I think" mentality.

How much of fatigue is mental? What proportion of that whine and doubt is just laziness talking? If I could just ignore how tired I think I am, how much faster or farther would I go?

Junk? Or just the lifestyle?

BIKE: 1 hr and 16.4 miles, just easy spinning indoors
COMMUTE: 6 miles

I did the indoor bike today just because. Because I wanted to. Because it's habit. Because I feel like if I don't do something I'm not myself.

So does that count as "junk" mileage? It's just a cardio workout. I wasn't looking for any particular training benefit, like speed work, power, strength, etc. I just wanted to burn off some energy.

So no, I'm not counting it as junk mileage. Instead I'm counting it towards what I'm calling my "lifestyle" mileage--the hours, yards, miles, and more that I feel I need to do just because. Add it to the commute miles, to the flights of stairs climbed (5+8+8 so far today), the standing desk at work, the long doggie walks, and the like.

Perhaps I should also count it as an addiction, given that I feel the "need" to do these things for no other good reason :)

Return to running!

RUN 6 miles in 57 mins
BIKE 9 miles in 30 mins
COMMUTE 6 miles

After yesterday's meandering go-nowhere post, time to focus!

Today's run was just a very light speed work at the track with TC. I hesitate to call it speed work--when I hit the gas for a few 200's there was nothing there! My knee feels OK, only some uncomfortable tendons in my feet that might like a few more easy days and no technicals this weekend.

The bike was purely aerobic extension, just to burn off energy.

My back and shoulders are sore from the P90X pushups yesterday :)

Excited, but not overly so. When does 2014 start?

Yesterday was my first weekend since April that I wasn't out running or otherwise training. It felt great, I don't think I had much run in my anyway, but something was missing.

I miss the routine. The goal. The need to finish something.

It's that time of year when I'm usually in a limbo. Each fall I'm recovering (I'll also note here that one year ago was Redman weekend!) from my year-end A race. The whole taper I'm telling myself about how great it will be to do something else besides the training. Then the race is over and I'm looking to get back into it. Usually I'm wanting back too soon, and I hit a late fall burn-out from jumping back too fast.

But one of my new life goals is to not ride a course of peaks and valleys between races, and instead roll from one to the other in a continuum. So instead of parking on the couch right after MT50, I have the next race/goal in mind--something concrete and defined. Unlike "cyclocross races", and more like "McNot Again 30M".

So yes I have the McNot Again on the calendar. After that? Nothing planned. Maybe some cyclocross races.

After that? Things get a little more specific come the new year. I've pretty much crossed 3DoS off the list for 2014, I just can't balance ultra running with swimming and biking. I haven't seen a pool since late July for Route 66! And I have some pretty big goals for next year without 3DoS! I'm going to put them to paper here in case I need a few laughs later, because these things are always funny to come back and read.

First goal: MiTi in late August. If I start training in mid February, this race will still be within the "build" phase of the training plan which has B2B as the A race. MiTi is a remarkably small race, so  much so that shooting for an AG podium ain't all that hard when there's only 3 or so peeps in the AG!! So I decided on a OA podium! Yeah, really, I did! The OA times for the past two years of the race were 11:30. Ha ha ha ha! I'd have to be faster than LC to pull that off.

Why am I laughing? Am I saying I can't do it? 1:30 swim, 6:00 bike, and 4:00 run, plus some T1 and T2 time...ugh...that adds up to about 11:30! It's a flat course too, so that really helps. Based on prior races, that's only a 15 min improvement on the swim, a 45-60 min improvement on the bike, and a 45 min improvement on the run. Hooo, the run, that's a big chunk of time. BUT--I'm a runner, right?!? Am I saying that the lesson learned in Rt 66 this year is not to be counted?!?  I'm faster and stronger than I think I am!

Keep in mind that I wanted a 12:30 at Redman and ended with a 13:23. The problem there wasn't realistic training for that goal. To be realistic about this, I'd have to drop the group rides every other weekend and find another gear to train in. I'd have to be serious about it, not so social and having fun.

Second goal: B2B in late October. Birthday Iron!! Less concrete goals for this race. MiTi would the the "troubleshooting race" 8 weeks prior. That's a short turn-around time, so B2B might be less A race than I can hope for. Dammit. Quit doubting, see above! If I missed the 11:30 goal at MiTi, I could shoot for it again here.

Third goal: 5K OWS, no race picked yet. What better way to improve the swim, than to pick a big race and focus on it?

So here I am, dreaming about 2014 already. I re-started P90X this morning. Instead of the Classic I'm doing a plan somewhere between Classic and Lean. I have a training "plan" for McNot Again that gets me on the run again and doing 20 milers on weekends. (BTW--"only" 20 miles, hahahahahah!!). I'd love to do Ride The Rivers, but I don't think I'll be century-fit in 3 weeks. I'll just be injured. I brought my swim gear with me today hoping to squeeze in a swim somewhere, but that's not going to happen.

Lots of mental meandering, all quickly answered. Do I need a new IM training plan? No, cuz I don't follow the one I have very well to take it's full benefit. What swim will I do in 2014? Too early to tell, the calendars aren't populated yet. I'm reading Jurek's Eat & Run right now, how's my nutrition looking? Great, better than ever, aside from a few bad habits that peeked up during recovery week.

Ugh, I miss having running to do!

BRONZED! And the MT50 recovery week

I found out Tues night--I placed 3rd OA out of finishing 14 women, and 10th overall in the finishing field of 39! WOOT!

Recovery week went surprisingly smoothly. I'm still having knee pain (as of Friday) but it's decreasing by the day. I haven't done anything in terms of training yet, and that's probably what has kept me from being a tired, crabby, sore, fatigued athlete. I'm just letting the recovery roll.

The recovery has been so smooth that it's prompted me to try to figure out why. Some ideas--
1. I didn't experience any GI upset in the run, so no GI recovery to manage. I was able to eat and drink as needed to rebuild.
2. I was hydrating well in the race, especially at the last 5 miles. When I was walking, I told myself to start recovery "now".
3. My post-race food and water were immediately accessible, and I was able to eat them quickly.
4. I had a wonderful sherpa who let (made, haha) me focus on recovery, instead of getting distracted by post race fatigue.
5. I really focused on recovery the week after the race. No commuting, so "fun run", so swim. Nuttin'.
6. Instead of thinking of the MT50 as the last race, I looked at it as one race in a continuum, so I immediately started thinking about what I needed to do for something like Ride The Rivers and/or McNot Again.

Full moon week! Feeling great, and looking forward to the McNot Again 30M.

The Mark Twain 50 Race Report

RUN 50 miles in 11 hrs 19 minutes 48 seconds

My race goals:
1. 11-12 hour finish. Sub 11 would be nice too, but likely out of reach for me.
2. Stay steady and don't get injured.
3. Nail the nutrition and hydration.

My strategies:
1. Break the race up into 5 mile increments, and keep each one between 60-70 minutes.
2. Run aid station to aid station, don't focus on the entire distance.
3. Eat on schedule no matter what, drink more than you think you can, and be realistic.

Race morning: Up at 4am for 2 eggs (forgot the half of Powerbar until we got to the site) and coffee. My stuff was pre-packed and ready to go so dressing. TH had Lose Yourself to play for in the car on the drive, we got busy with the driving and didn't play it, but I took the music in my head for the day. It was still dark, and a million stars were overhead in a dazzling array. Smoke and ash from the campfires sprinkled out of the dark into the headlamps. Everything was so still and quiet, but the prerace buzz was everywhere. We met up with TV and M and did our little rituals. TH kept me moving and on target, which led to a very quick and slick prep.

The report will break up the race into 5 mile increments. Another way to look at it was by the aid stations, positioned roughly every 5 miles, so there will be some overlap in how I analyze this.The garmin wasn't accurate over the course (it ended the first loop at 25.5, and the race at 52 miles), but it's close enough for me to gauge time over the roughly 5 mile intervals. Not once did I look at my HR during the race.

Miles 0-5: 66 minutes 132 bpm. As I'm finding with ultras, the start is more of a casual gathering, often in the dark with the size of the site being all you can see from the cumulative headlamps. The "go" was just a simple signal, and we were off and running...for about 100y before the group choked together at the start of the trail. We walked, still all smiles and jokes, and I enjoyed the easing into the run. TV was right behind me, and soon enough the groups broke up and we ended up near the front of a small train that was moving easy for their 100M run -- so a little too easy for me. I needed to break out and settle into my own pace. At 1.9 miles and 30 mins, I knew I needed out. Hi-5 to TV, then passed the two girls ahead of me. I wasn't moving much faster, I just needed my own space. But I missed the company. Soon enough the headlamp wasn't needed, the sunrise was slow and soft--a light glow that led to soft shadows that soon enough was a crisp, golden sunlight. As you can tell, the first 5 miles were quite pleasant, and I was very happy to see that even though it seemed like I walked too much I was still within my time goals.

Miles 6-10: 61-62 minutes 134 bpm. After a brief aid station stop, I kept on. TV was behind me--I could hear him talking and laughing. I wanted to run with him, but feared our paces wouldn't match and one of us would be pushed or pulled into the wrong pace. Rolling, rolling, everything running along and a song in my head. I was humming my race theme song "Have A Nice Day", along with It's My Life and Lose Yourself. Passed a few women, then started leap-frogging with two guys and often found myself having to "reel it in" and slow down the pace. There was a section of trail on a paved road, pleasantly downhill, then an AS stop. Saw TV again, managed a dry crossing of Brazil Creek, then got into a group with 4 other runners--the leap-froggers and two women.

Miles 11-15: 56 minutes 143bpm. This little train of runners set a smooth and quick pace, I was in the middle of a group that spoke not a word for the first few miles.  It helped that this interval was a fast section of course. So far we'd seen lots of rocks--big and small and gravely, one major hill, roots, dirt, rolling hills, but now we were getting long slow declines on smooth ground. It might have been too fast, maybe too much? I eventually passed the two women, then me and my leap-froggers moved ahead. I wondered a few times if I was being pushed by the runners behind me, but I kept to it anyway. In this section I had a hard trip over what was probably a root and had a near-fall. About a mile later, I did it again. Ack!

Miles 16-20: 62 minutes 138 bpm. I was running alone again in this segment, through another quick section of smooth declines and easy trail. I kept getting the distances messed up in my head, thinking that 20 miles was the start/finish area. I also kept getting the mental map of the race messed up. When we ran this in June, we ran clockwise, but in my head it was c-clockwise! Even though I knew it was wrong, I couldn't over-write the memory. That problem carried into today, I had to keep correcting my mental GPS. So a little confusion in this section, and the first signs of mental fatigue were kicking in. I started on a bag of Sport Beans with caffeine to see if things improved. BTW-cherry SB's taste awful.

Miles 21-25: 63 minutes 139 bpm. This loop took me into the start/finish and ended the first lap. I kept myself going in two ways. First, I was really looking forward to seeing TH. All during the run, every time I thought about her (what was she doing, was she resting her arm, was she volunteering) and every time I had a What Would T Tell Me To Do moment I took a sip of water. I felt like I had so much to tell her, all these things happening in the race! Second, I had delusions of my place in the race. I'd passed a number of females and saw none ahead of me. So I had a voice in my head saying "I wonder if we're near the front". A delusion for sure--the front runners were hours ahead of me--but oddly enough the delusion kept me focused. At the same time that voice spoke up, another countered with a "don't be so foolish". But once I realized it was working for me, I let them argue it out.

Miles 26-30: 70 minutes 134 bpm. This section contained the stop at the drop bag. MV refilled my Camelbak and TH grabbed my drop bag. It was like a Nascar stop! Left to my own devices, I would have stopped longer, but TH kept me focused. Bathroom break (sadly my first in the race, even though I had to pee 10 miles earlier, I was worried my leap-froggers would pass me again see me!), then off for more miles. Knowing that walking didn't affect my time much the first time I came through here helped me relax some. I kept thinking--slowing down now is GOOD, bank the energy, reel it in. I even did a fishing reel motion with my somewhat swollen hands. It seemed to take forever to get to the next aid station, I swear they moved it!

Miles 31-35: 66 minutes 135 bpm. This next section was the first indication of a breakdown in physical terms. The first twinges of knee problems started in this section. I knew the 2nd AS was just over 4 miles away and after the pavement section, so I found some comfort in knowing this was a "short" section. I got a little mentally distracted with the Garmin being off mileage. It read 35 miles as I came into the AS at 34 miles. It shouldn't have bothered me, but it did. The 2nd AS near the creek came and went (saw TV again!), had a few moments of the Garmin losing satellite signal (more mental distraction), another dry crossing, then off to the next AS.

Miles 36-40: 65 minutes 134 bpm. The next AS was 6 miles away, which didn't seem bad at first. In my head, I told myself that I'd trained to 30 miles multiple times so 30 mile is easy. After that, 35 miles ain't so bad. Then just 15 more! But this section drug out so long, and looking back I'd put the "halfway" mark of the race right here. This is where the "race begins", so to speak. I was running alone until I came up behind a runner I accompanied until the next AS. He was a Korean guy my age who had the most impressive running resume I'd ever heard (15-16 100's, Western States, 314 mi in VolState, and more more more)! Super nice, positive energy, and a calm approach to this sluggish section. This all helped when we both realized we were out of water in a sunny mile of course! By now my right knee was a problem--I was down to fast walk over all rocks--but still moving strong.

Miles 41-45: 69 minutes 128 bpm. This was the "10 miles to go" aid station! TV caught up to me there and I got a much-needed boost from seeing him. I wasn't ready to admit to knee problems yet, somehow doing that would make it real. I was afraid to stop for too long for fear that my leg would stiffen up, so I was in and out. "34 out the door" as I said it. I'd hoped a few of the people I'd left behind at the AS would catch me, and TV did pass me soon enough. But I was struggling. I wanted to run; my knee didn't. The pain was lateral on the right knee, the best I can describe it: a tightness in the connective tissues. Not an injury pain, nothing broken or torn. But enough that I was losing confidence in having a sure step through rocks and uneven ground, so I walked those sections to prevent a more serious injury. I had moments where I wanted to cry, then I was euphoric and dancing to mental music, then the feeling of wanting to cry again. That's a sign of low glucose--time to eat!! I was discouraged to see the increased time on the clock, but I was still within my 60-70 min range. Happy with that, I kept it rolling. The last AS seemed to take forever to reach. By this time I was almost counting the tenths.

Miles 46-50: 76 minutes 119 bpm. TV passed me again out of the AS and headed off to finish his last loop. I was down to a fast walk now. Walking didn't hurt, so I restructured my goals. 1. Don't create a more permanent injury. 2. Save some energy to run across the finish line. 3. Try for 11hrs. I was walking as fast as I could, running on the smooth downhills and flats. I was yelling at myself to run, to dig deep, to gut it out, to HTFU, and I did. But my heart was racing (it felt like it was anyway), my mind was churning ideas, and my knee wasn't having any of it. Soon enough I was walking only the downhills. 11hrs came and went, so I restructured again to finish under 11:23, which I thought would be 2 hrs under my Poto time.

Garmin overrun: 2 miles 30 minutes 116 bpm. The last 2 miles, which were really miles 48-50 of the race, went by in a drawn-out frenzy. I was doing the fastest walk I could, following the "run when you can, walk if you have to" mentality. It seemed to take forever. And then I realized that 13:23 was my Ironman PR, not my Poto time! I needed to MOVE to get a 2hr PR of 11:18. I passed the sign marking the turn-off of the Ozark Trail (the first time by this sign I was disappointed to realize that wasn't the turn to the start/finish area) and eagerly watched for the real final turn. By now I'd been mentally cheerleading myself--2 more miles!! 1.5 more miles!! 1 more mile!! Now I was down to tenths, how many more I didn't know. As I came over the last hill and the clock came into view-- I was motivated to run to beat 11:20. I did! A hi-5 and hug from the RD TL, my medal, and I'm DONE!

Post-race. TH kept me on target getting food, fresh clothes, and rest. When I finally peeled off the socks, tape, and bandages, I was surprised to find a nice fat blood blister on the medial left foot. But that's it--no other chafing, blisters, cuts, falls, blood, injuries--compared to many other runners out there that I saw with real battle scars. Seeing them kept me in my place, and caused some more mental arguing in my last 5 miles. I had a mixed post-race recovery. On one hand, I was in actuality injury-free and very grateful for the complete lack of ankle rolls, falls, or other acute injuries. I finished remarkably clean. On the other hand, that last hour of the race was a walk fest and my body was upset with my knee for being the rate-limiting step in my finish time. But to be honest-- my tummy, mind, and body were just blaming the knee. I really didn't have a lot of run left in me and if it wasn't the knee complaining something else would have in its place.

In summary--a fabulous end to my race season! A PR, a perfect weekend of weather and trail conditions, an awesome sherpa who I can't thank enough, no major injuries, and a certainty that 100 mile races are NOT in my immediate future! I'm not even sure I want to do 50 miles ever again. But I always say that, give me a week. :)

The next day, I was up/down in energy as usual for post-race, but I was definitely happy and buzzing. A song heard on the way home: Good Feeling by Flo Rida. New to me, but it's been on the air for 2 years now.

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, sometimes I get a good feeling, yeah

I get a feeling that I never never never never had before, no no

I get a good feeling, yeah 

The mountain top, walk on water

I got power, feel so royal

One second, I'ma strike oil

Diamond, platinum, no more for you

Got adrenaline, never giving in

Giving up's not an option, gotta get it in

Witness I got the heart of 20 men

No fear, go to sleep in the lion's den

That flow, that spark, that crown

You looking at the king of the jungle now

Stronger than ever can't hold me down

A hundred miles gunnin' from the pitcher's mound

Straight game face, it's game day

See me running through the crowd full of melee

Is that 3rd line from the bottom a sign that I'll do 100 someday?!