Finally an outdoor ride

BIKE: 32 miles in 2hrs. Roughly.

One of my training goals this week was to get outside on the bike. So when DC suggested a Saturday ride, I was all for it. Wind and all.

We rode from Columbia on the usual 30-mile route down to Valm. Hills and headwinds the entire way out. Knowing what to expect, I brought the Bird. Good thing too. We did about 13mph on the way out and hit 27mph (at least) on the way home.

This is a relatively late start for me in terms of riding. Usually by now I'm ready for metrics, not half metrics. Looking at my schedule, I'm thinking about an Oly in 3 weeks. Two more training weekends! I NEED TO FOCUS!

Catch Up Post

Tuesday BIKE: 1hr 15 mins with 40min hard effort
Weds SWIM: 1hr 2400y with 20x50 as odds=hard/evens=easy
Weds RUN: 45 mins 5miles in the rain!
Thurs RUN: 1hr 6.5 miles dehydrated
Fri DAY OFF

Time flies when you're having fun. Time is flying. But but am I having fun? I think so. I'm just too busy to notice.

This week so far has been a get a new schedule and catch up on the to do list type of week. With Rich working 7-ON and me being out of the house pretty much every night this week I'm just not sitting down for this. On the plus side, lots is getting done.

My Gung-ho start to Pigman Training

SWIM: 1hr 2200 yards. MMM. 5x250 main set.
STRENGTH: 15 min Tabatas: 8x20s (10s) of plank, pushup, crunch, squat. Total of 32 20 second intervals.

Actually managed to get to swim almost on time today, I walked in at 5:30 instead of after 5:30. Class starts at 5:30!! So get there EARLIER!

I was all gung-ho this morning. It is the 1st day of Pigman training and after a week of rest and recovery I’m jazzed about training. The next 8 weeks will be a steep climb to get to what I consider to be a solid base of training, since I’ve been running so much my swim and bike are behind. But I can deal with that.

So I marched onto the pool deck and instead of picking the slowest lane, I asked CHG “which lane?” and hopped right into the crowded 2nd lane. I haven’t swum since the Weds before the race, so I was a bit rusty. Gung-ho’edly-rusty at that. I was on the attack. I’d listened to the Savage CD Vol 1 on the drive to the pool and had Just Go stuck in my head. I was full-on, head first, charging back and forth across the pool.

Of course it didn’t last long. Soon enough we had fins on and my right ankle was unhappy with it. But I kept going, hoping my ankle would pop back into place on its own soon. Then the intervals: 3x600 broken up into 6x300. I re-dialed that to as many 250’s I could get done, knowing that my lane mates would lap me in the 300’s. I had trouble swimming straight; I kept hitting the lane lines with my right arm and hand. As part of my gung-ho’edness, I stayed after class to talk to CHG about it. I’m crossing my left hand over my head—put that on the list for Wednesday’s swim.

Then a crossfit session, using my new xfit app to generate a workout. The plank was supposed to be pull-ups, so I sub’d that out for planks. This was harder that it sounds to do; I imagine that tomorrow I’ll be feeling the pain! Yea! This is part of the Savage training: build lean strength for the WHill. Cuz I’m gonna gung-ho’edly attack that too come September.

Easter Run

RUN: 4.5 miles in 40.5 minutes. Felt fast. It was a beautiful, still, sunny, morning run.

Thursday already

NO RUN!! Breakfast instead! :)

Still struggling to recover. Not from the race though. The muscle soreness was gone yesterday and today I'm bouncing my legs and feeling energetic. It's the "other" thing I'm recovering from. It's more mental than physical, and will take more time. I just don't care right now, but I'm getting there.

I'm planning my weekly schedule for the upcoming weeks! It's exciting, taking this week off and keeping myself away from training. I might run tonight, but plans are pretty up in the air.

Recovery Continues

I keep checking the SLUGs webpage for final times and pictures. In the meantime, I'm still recovering. Still stiff and sore, but I've been much worse. Still no focus or concentration. I think I'm dealing with two sources of depression, and unfortunately they are both going to have to be dealt with at the same time.

There's the post-race depression. This usually follows the big races that had a long lead-in training time. Or high expectations. It's a feeling of emptiness and lack of drive. For the past 4.5 months, I've been preparing for this race! And now it's over, just like that! I've managed this depression before, and I'm pretty certain that it'll wear off quickly. It's the beginning of the year, so the next big race is just around the corner, so to speak.

Then there's the loss of our family member, Scully. By coincidence, she's been sick 4.5 months, since the first weekend in December. Funny how these two events tracked with each other. We devoted so much time to the dog even before she got sick, but afterwards life revolved around her. I'd get up early to swim so I could be home before DH left for work, so Scully wouldnt be home alone. I skipped afternoon workouts to be with her. I cut short weekend sessions to let her out. In the end, it was maybe good for me since I didn't need to be putting in any more hours training than I was already. But just like I eat to train, I was training to care for her. Training provided a break, however brief, from the minute to minute caring for her.

In retrospect, I now see just how much time went to her, how much thought, and how much energy. She'd wake me up at 4:30am and want out, then want food. She had to be drugged at the same time. Then I'd either carry back to bed, where she'd stay until DH got up, or, if I wasn't training, I'd sit with her to keep her resting until DH got up. Then walkies if she was up to it. Then some personal time before I left for work. During the day, either DH or I would go home over lunch to check her. Then I'd be home early to let her out, repeating a similar routine as the morning: personal time, sitting to keep her quiet, feeding, drugging, carrying, etc. It got to the point that I couldn't even go to the basement without making her anxious. So a lot of sitting with her, to let her rest and keep quiet. All that was in the hope of her getting better with more rest.

Yet her decline continued, rest or no rest. Some days were good, others bad. Some days a scare for what was next, others a joy to see her upbeat and happy again. It was an emotional roller-coaster.

And now the ride is over.

Today I woke up to no dog. No food, no fresh water, no drugs. No spoonful of peanut butter. I sat at the counter like habit taught me, but even in the need to be quiet I stayed quiet. I just sat there. Lost.

Unfortunately, this will be a big rest week for me and I won't be getting up for training. Leaving me to sit quietly. Lost. Alone in thought, holding back a tide of emotion.

And while this blog isn't about the dog, it is about me, and obviously this will affect me for the next few weeks. So bear with me as I grapple with this loss, work out the emotional issues, and learn a new routine to live by. And as I learn to live not as a caregiver devoted to someone I love, but as a ....

That's the part that gets me. What will I be next? While I had her, even before she was sick, I had a reason to go home early, a reason to cut short a weekend session, a reason to be home. Now I don't have to run home for anything. I can work all I want. Train all I want.

Sunday's Recovery

Just a quick post race follow-up. I didn't ice bath or stretch after the DC race. I wasn't even all that hungry. But I did drink good and managed to eat some small meals. I stayed off my feet and wore the compression socks. I wouldn't change anything I did.

On Sunday the soreness had already set in, mostly in my front quad muscles. I think that's a redundancy--the "back" quad muscles are the hamstrings! I stiffened up if I quit moving but this worked out quickly. Again, I stayed off my feet most of the day.

Overall, it was a quiet, depressing day. I didn't feel like doing anything and could't concentrate.

Double Chubb 50K Race Report

RUN: 31 miles, 6 hours, 27 minutes. Hoo boy. This could take a while to type. And there are two stories, intertwined and inseparable. The DC race will always be linked in my mind to yesterday. I've been training since December, about the same time the dog got sick. The last few weeks were the hardest, the taper and her the last of her sickness coincided. Then yesterday. Then today.

Race morning. I woke up at 4:45am. Same as always, but no Scully at my feet. I resolve right then to not cry or dwell until after the race. Get through the race, then mourn. Banana, egg whites, baby bel cheese, coffee. On my way out the door, I'm certain I'm forgetting something, but know in the back of my mind that all those long runs in training had a reason--this was habit. Pack and clothing list: tri singlet for the pockets, tech T, long sleeve tech, light gloves, capris, BRR hat, 4 powerbars, 5 gels, fuel belt with water and Infinit, gum, endurolytes, bandaids.

Drove out, got my packet, and had about a half hour before the start. I learned at packet pickup that there was a drop bag site at the halfway point turn-around, so I did some repacking of my bag. I was still debating which shoes to wear. All morning I'd been doubting the 6hr comfort of my trail shoes. They were stiff after being cleansed of mud from Quivering Quads. And I had to tape my feet, as previous runs proved their tendency to blister the sides of my feet. This was my last chance to change to my Brooks trainers. Good lug tread vs worn treads of 400+ mile trainers. Water resistance vs ventilating mesh. Stone guard vs light soft foam. The choice seemed obvious. Yet I decided to pack the Brooks in the drop bag, just in case. Noshed a Powerbar, and tried to get my heart into the day. My head was in it, just not my heart. It didn't help that it was cold (low 40's) with a very light misty rain. Just get through the race...

My club mate DoCo met up with me, and we walked to the drop site together. There were trees with beautiful white flowers, another runner said they were dogwoods. How fitting. Quick bio-break (the stalls lacked doors, welcome to the trails!), double-check of gear, and 5 mins to the gun. While walking over with DoCo and another runner, I noticed for the first time that my socks were low enough on my ankle for the back of my shoes to rub my skin. !!should I change?? Alternate socks were right behind me in my drop bag...no...I'll be OK, I can change them later. This was decided as the gun went off and 120 runners went by ahead of us. We'd missed the start!

I'll divide the race into 4 parts. It's an out-n-back course done twice. Major features to note: big hill, railroad tracks, aid station, run along the river, steep creek crossing, cross the tracks again, fire road, big uphill, new section (didn't preview it in training run), aid station/turn-around. About 7.7 miles/part.

Lap 1: 7.05 miles, 1hr 29 mins, 12:40m/m, 1860ft climbing. It should be said here that the Garmin was less than accurate over the hills and trails, but it's a good rough estimate. The course starts uphill on a park road before quickly changing to trail. All uphill. This part of the trail was mostly rocky single-track. While it was hard to warm up going uphill, I took my time. Really, there's 30.5 miles to go, what's the rush?!

In the end I was happy to have missed the start with the race field. Instead of picking my way up a narrow rocky trail with a crowd, instead I had it all to myself. There was often a runner ahead of or behind me, but for the most part I was on my own. It was here I realized that the the hills were lined with dogwoods. Their white flowers highlighted the branches of each dogwood tree. They reminded me of my doggie's soft white fur. Instead of being sad, I was happy to have them there. In a silly way it was like having her along the trails with me. I recalled how Rich would bring her to the Go St Louis races, and I would see them at random places along the route. Scully was at every turn and most every thought. Get through the race, then mourn.

The first 3.6 miles where up and over the worst of the hills. I focused on keeping an easy, could-do-this-all-day pace. I forced myself to walk steep hills, promising myself that if I really felt that good 25 miles from now, then I could go faster. But not now! Ran for awhile with a friend-of-a-friend. Skipped the first aid station and headed to the river. Then a few miles with another woman who also did IM races. This section of the trail was muddy. Not shoe-sucking muddy, and not soaking muddy either. But enough that footing was slick and I often had to slow to pick my way around the mess. It made for good walk-breaks. Again, what was the rush?

Soon enough, the faster runners were turned around and coming back towards me. The 1st place runners were flying by. And everyone I passed had an encouraging greeting. This was fun! I had expected a large grouping of runners to come by at some point, but everyone was spread out. It felt like a big training run, with bibs and aid stations. Fun!

But at the same time, my mind would wander. To last moments. To hugs and kisses. Focus. To her staggering around the house. Her limp on the table. Stay focused.

Most every race has a song playing in my head. I don't listen to music while running, but it's playing anyway. Usually it's the last song I heard on the radio, or a song that wandered through my mind in response to a thought I have on the run. Today, it was I Get A Little Bit Stronger. I'd heard it last week while thinking of the dog. The overall arc of the song is completely off-topic, but the lines would flit though my head, randomly.

Woke up late today, and I still feel the sting of the pain.
But I brushed my teeth anyway, got dressed through the mess and put a smile on my face. I got a little bit stronger.

Crossed the creek, picked my way through the lightly flooded but mostly flat fire road, walked up the steep hill, crossed into the unfamiliar section, still feeling good. It was around this time I took my first gel. I was hydrating well, but not eating much. Hitting the first turn-around at 7.75 miles was great. I stopped to talk to the volunteers, they filled my fuel belt bottles. I didn't grab much food, only an orange section. I wanted to get running again and not linger too long.

Lap 2: 7.67 miles, 1hr 41mins, 13:16m/m 1700 ft climbed. One lap down, 3 more to go. I was enjoying the company of the 25K runners. I knew they'd be gone by the next lap so I chatted with those around me. On this lap I met a guy who had just turned 47 and wanted to finish 100 ultras before he turned 50. This race was #72. Wow! Down the steep fire road hill, splash through the fire road flat, cross the tracks, and back into the mud. All was going well, still a good pace and positive attitude. There were few dogwood trees at this end of the trail so my mind wandered less.

Then the creek crossing. The banks of the creek were as high as my head, if not more. One side was OK and easy to climb. The other not so much. It was a mud scrabble. I had to grab roots and ground to climb it. The first time by I was OK. This time I tried what looked like an alternate slope--and FELL! Haha, thanks to the mud it was a soft roll landing. The runner behind me said it the fall and recovery was The Essense of Grace. I had mud all down my right side and later found mud in the caps of my water bottles. The fall shook me a bit and turned my left knee a little. I stood up and felt dizzy. Instead of stopping, I kept going. 30 seconds later, still dizzy, I realized I needed to eat. So I dug out a Powerbar and ate half.

Run along the river, listening to birds chirping, through the mud-sand-mud trail (this made for some heavy shoes!). At some point in here I thought I was off the right trail! I stopped to look for other runners. No one. No sound. Nothing. !!Now What!! I think, go back a few yards, listen. The trail was long enough that I couldn't remember all of it. I waited, listened. Nothing. So I took a chance and kept going. Thankfully, I soon saw the turn back to the mid-way aid station. Whew! Here I stopped to chat awhile with the volunteers and refill the bottles. The Infinit was a fail, it foamed and frothed with running. Dumped it. The mileage at this point was around 12 miles. The main hills were next. Over the tracks up up the bluff. Back through the dogwoods. Once again my mind wandered. I hummed along to the song, and stayed positive.

Riding in the car to work, and I'm trying to ignore the hurt.
So I turned on the radio, Stupid song made me think of you,
I listened to it for minute, but then I changed it.
I'm getting a little bit stronger, just a little bit stronger.

Through this section I had to focus on picking up my feet more, I kept hitting rocks and missing my step. Eat more. Down with the other half of the Powerbar while walking the uphill sections. The turn-around and halfway point was just ahead! But before I could turn around, I had to climb the Chingpin? Chinkpin? something like that loop. Let's call it the Chingie. Oh DAMN, so steep you can't run it. But it led me to the turnaround and to the drop site. A bio-break proved my hydration was doing good. I didn't need anything from the bag so I didn't stop. Back out for more. First lap in 3hrs 9 mins.

Lap 3: 7.37 miles, 1hr 34mins, 12:46 m/m 2054ft climbed. I decided that I had so much fun the first time around I wanted to do it again. And that instead of saying "good job" to other runners, I would say "great job". So I still had a positive mood while I ran through the dogwood trees. Crisp white flowers, bright spots in the shaded green woods. Along with flashes of memories. Dragging hind legs. Sleepy eyes closing for the last time. Limp body. For the first time, tears threatened to spill, but I managed to hold them off. Focus now, cry later. Besides, tears obscuring the trail? Bad Idea. Instead I though of Scully with Rich at previous races, Scully watching the runners go by, Scully wanting to run with them. Panting with that Joker-smile she had. This was much better.

Passed by DoCo here and stopped to chat with him. Seeing him on the trail was a highlight, I wished he could do the full race like he had planned to but I thought him all the stronger for recognizing his limits. I don't' know if I could have changed from 50K to 25K like he did. I would have just flogged myself through the 50K even if my training wasn't what it should have been. He said he'd be waiting at the finish, and this kept me moving.

Back at the mid-way aid station. Chatted a few minutes. Back along the river. Only 10 more miles!!! I can do that!! Now the trail was very quiet, very few other runners to pass. I was eating and drinking on a better schedule (and could tell when I wasn't eating enough, my mood would start to slip!). I was comfortable, with some foot discomfort but noting unexpected. This was going great! My mind really was clearer on this section of trail, whether it was the terrain or the lack of dogwoods or the constant mud-avoiding, can't say. Crossed the creek, over tracks, down the fire road, walked up the big hill. I swear it was steeper the second time around. Around this point I could feel a light buzzing in my chest. I'd experienced this in previous marathons. Not sure what it is, muscle fatigue? Either way, it was a sign that here at 22 miles the race was starting to take a toll. But the fact that I wanted to keep jogging, instead of stopping to walk, was a great sign.

Lap 4. 7.8 miles, 1hr 40 mins, 13:50 2200 ft climbed. In reviewing the data, I surprised to find that the outbound laps were faster even though in my mind it seemed the reverse. I broke the last lap into sections: just run to the next landmark, then the next, then the next. At one point I realized I had passed 26 miles and that every step I took was the farthest I'd ever run before. Every step was a small victory.

I hit some low points in this lap, but nothing that made me want to stop. I was still bopping along and willing to keep jogging. But I was stumbling more, lightly rolling my ankles on nothing, and feeling a tightness in my knees. The uneven trail was starting to wear on my legs. I knew that tomorrow would hurt. Heck, later today would hurt. But now was now and I had only miles to go. I passed the mid-way aid station for the last time. Back up the hill, and back into the dogwoods.

My troubles with stumbling kept me from looking up at the trees, but by now the idea must have been implanted in my mind. The song was more prominent in my mind, the frustrations over stumbling increasing, the need to walk unavoidable. My mind wandered from topic to topic less but would stick on a topic longer. The physical pain became more raw and took some of my focus. Staring at the ground more, I saw dogwood flowers on trail. At one point I picked on up to hold it. Then threw it down. Focus.

Doesn't happen over night, but you turn around and a months gone by,
And you realize you haven't cried.
I'm not giving you a hour or a second or another minute longer.
I'm busy getting stronger.

I started losing track of my landmarks in this last section. I remembered up to the picnic table but lost it after that. Having the garmin off on the mileage kept me from knowing whether the next hill or the next next hill was the last. I got to the point where I just wanted to be done. But I stayed positive and still didn't feel the need to walk. This was the most surprising part of the day for me, in other long races I'd reach a low point so low that I didn't want to keep moving. That didn't happen today. I just wanted to get this done. Get home. Cry.

Finally the last half mile! And one more run up the Chingie trail. Even walking up it was tough. The hill went on forever! Then back down to the finish line. Finish line! Most of the way down the hill, volunteers spotted me and started the cowbells. The sweet music of cowbells! Down the hill, around the turn, and through the finish in just under 6.5 hours. FINISHED!

DoCo met me at the finish line. I was handed my belt buckle. I didn't eat anything at the end, and just wanted to go home. I was cold, tired, and dirty. So the finish was sort of anticlimatic. I was done. And that was it. I just wanted to go home. DoCo gave me a ride to the truck (THANK YOU!!!) and once there I started to crack a bit. I'd promised myself I'd keep it together until the race was done and now it was done. Now I could cry. And I did, just a little.

Before the race, I'd thought I'd get some Ted Drewe's on the way home. With peanut butter and bananas. But I'd bought some TD's to share with the dog yesterday along with some extra for today so I didn't need to stop. I thought about stopping for something else to eat, usually I have something to eat right after a race. I needed to eat, but didn't feel like stopping anywhere. Just get home. And on they way, my song played not once, but twice. Twice.

I know my heart will never be the same,
but I'm telling myself I'll be okay,
Even on my weakest days, I get a little bit stronger.
I get a little bit stronger.

Once home, the tears started. No one to greet me at the door. No one to share a smile with. No one to keep me company. I don't want to dwell on this, or make this race all about what happened, but what happened shaped this race. But that was it. I did the race, and that was it. No fan fare, no real celebration. It had such a flat feeling. Hopefully I can celebrate this race at some point.

Perhaps in a way this helped me through the race. It had a reason to keep going, something to think about for 6.5 hrs. To avoid the pain of missing her, I instead kept focused on the trail. All those training miles the past few weeks were chances to think about her over the years. Wanting to get home with her again kept me moving for the past few months. And so I've decided that every year I will take a run on the trails when the dogwoods are blooming as a way of again running with her. Not by my side, but in my heart.

A stump for a tail

DAY OFF. Pre-race day is supposed to be restful, mindful of nutrition and hydration. Instead it was one of the hardest days of my life.

I went to work early to get stuff done. Then I left early to get home to the doggie. We spent the afternoon together. Tricks for cookies. Ted Drewe's custard. Nappin' on the bed. Hugs. Kisses.

It was our last afternoon together. I cried off and on. I've been crying inside for weeks, but I finally let loose. My poor doggie couldn't walk anymore, couldn't climb the stairs, and paced anxiously. I carried her everywhere, gave her rides on the mama-vator. Even gave a little elevator "ding" at the top of the steps for her. More hugs. More kisses.

Then it was time to go. Crying turned to sobbing, all the way to the vet. Once we got there, some family time before we headed in with her. I told her how much I loved her. How I'd always be her mama. How she was such a good dog. Those were the last words she heard.

Thirteen years ended today. How can something like that just end? It was like a switch. We left with a dog, but came home just the two of us. Now she is physically gone, but still in my heart.

Love ya, boo-boo. I'll always be your mama.

I bought a single trusting heart
That gave devotion from the start
If you think these things are not for sale
Buy a brown-eyed puppy with a stump for a tail

2 miles, and 2 miles ONLY

RUN 2 whole miles, 20 minutes is all. No wait, MMR says 2.3 miles. I actually got up at the usual time for the Thursday run. The run itself was OK, but I was distracted. And later my leg "bones" ached. It felt like the bones hurt, but it was probably the muscles.

Wednesday swim

SWIM 45 mins 1500y Went to CoC and did 100y focus drills, focusing on one thing at a time. I like this pool, think I'm going to cancel my Y membership and go here instead. Especially one the outdoor 50m pool opens!

No bike, just a run

RUN: 3.1 miles, 30 mins in the Kinvaras I realize a 3 mile run in the minimalist shoes just days before a big race might be a bad idea, but I did it anyway. My legs were tired when I got done, but now hours later I don't feel it. I still don't think I've quite adapted to those shoes. How's the taper going? I think I need LC to give a taper-talkin'-to. I rode the Puppy to work today and tried to take it easy. I'm skipping stairs. And I'm starting to get some of that energy back that I've been missing the past 2 weeks.

Switched up Monday

BIKE: 60 mins abt 18 miles Went to bed tired, and woke up tired. Too tired to swim. And I did want to get a bike ride in this week at some point, I figured the earlier the better. So I dug out MattD's DVD's, selected Vol 5 Hills, and oh damn, it was an 80 min workout but I only did 60. Loved it! But I need to be resting!!!!!

One more 6-miler

RUN: 6 miles in 60 mins This ended up as a late afternoon run. I usually suffer in these, between having foods in my tummy and maybe a few hours of work already in, I have troubles holding a good pace. True again. My mental focus was awful. I ended up walking a few times to get the focus back. Cheered the Go St Louis runners today, wish I was there but I'm glad to be doing something different this year. NUMERICS: total of 6.5 hrs, one more taper week to go! SWIM 1500y in 40mins BIKE 17 miles in 60 mins RUN 31 miles in 4.8 hrs

Last long run, in the wrong shoes

RUN: 12.5 miles in 2hrs. One last "long" run. Then tomorrow a 10K, then a steep taper. I was getting ready to head out when I grabbed my shoes and checked for dirt in the soles before putting them on. I noticed just how ragged they are, another reminder to buy the new shoes I've needed since February. I also noticed that they were the Brooks 7.5!! I'm supposed to be running in my Brooks 8's! When did I change?? The only way I can change is to swap the insoles, so it's not a random bad grab in the closet. Apparently, they aren't bothering me. The 8's replaced the slightly too small 7.5's. (Let's ignore the fact that the 7.5's have been in semi-retirement since last March--why are they still in the closet!?) Put 'em on, went out the door. Today was a tour of old houses: LFP, BP, then TGP. I looked at doors and paint as research for our house. So I saw a lot of new areas and since it wasn't an out-n-back I didn't mind meandering. I was a little sluggish, but enjoying it. At many points I wondered just how long I'd been running in the 7.5's. How messed up was my shoe's mileage log? A few lewd a-holes with comments to me, but otherwise a normal run. I expect that sh!t in the City. Around mile 7.5 in TGP I noticed not for the first time that my shoes were loose. It's the socks, I think, I'm wearing thin socks. No, I wear these socks all the time. This was frustrating! Wrong shoes, loose laces,....where is the well-oiled, honed, kinks-worked-out system I've had? WTH?? So I stop to pull the laces, at which point I realize... ...I'm not wearing my Brooks. I'm wearing a pair of old Sauc's! (75% of my running shoes are white with blue and gray, hard to distinguish if I'm not paying attention). So old, in fact, they aren't even on my shoe mileage log anymore! These are retired shoes I wear to work!?!?!?!? I'm doing a long run in these!?!?!? WHAT?!?!?! My feet were feeling good up to this point. But about 0.5 miles after they realized what was happening, they started to complain a little. Haha, I'm sure that was all in my head. But this was a surprise--so much for new shoes with cushy support and fresh poly foam. Or were my feet so acclimated to all this running that they can handle a little beating?

so far behind again

Monday swim: 40 mins about 1500y Tuesday bike: 60 mins about 17 miles Wednesday run: 56 mins 6 miles 9:19m/m Thursday run: 52 mins 6.5 miles 8:00 m/m What a week, and it was all going to "end" today around 7pm. But we've received a stay of sorts until Monday. So until then I'm going to work to get things back on track. Today's run was the first fast run in quite some time! It was tough but I'm surprised now looking at the pace that I was able to do it. I've been so sluggish this week, overwhelmed by everything I'm behind on and worn out emotionally. All workout goals and energy is consumed by worry for the poor doggie. Ol' Toothless. But if I make a concerted effort, I'll get things back on track here.

It's 65F outside and I'm riding indoors

BIKE: abt 35 miles 2hrs indoors.

Dog is still sick, so I stayed inside to keep an eye on her. I was supposed to run today, but oddly enough I just don't want to run right now. Last 2 weeks was 50+, this week I've only run once for 15 miles. I still have tomorrow and hope to get in 6-10. This low mileage won't hurt me for the race, so I'm not worried about it.

I am worried about the dog. And my in-stress eating habits. Not good. I tend to eat and not realize I'm eating at all, so I'm always on the look-out for nothing. And I don't drink enough for some reason. Focus on it!

Back-blog of posts

Tues: BIKE: 1.25hr about 22 miles
Weds: BIKE: 1hr about 16 miles, then 15 mins strength
Thurs: RUN: 2/25hr 14.4 miles

Well once again the dog is sick. And as before it's enough to tip the balance and set me off schedule, this time both time-wise and emotionally. The coughing started again Monday night, and here we are on Friday.

The bike rides are boring, I think I need to pull out a DVD. I'm also thinking about decorating the Pain Cave with some Las Vegas decor, some inspiration and reminders that I'm not just sitting there to be sitting there. And some SavageMan Hills picts!! If that don't scare ya into building strength, then nothing will.

The Weds run got moved to Thurs. It was supposed to be 15.5 miles. At first I thought I'd reverse the runs, but by the time Weds afternoon rolled around the only energy I had was wasted on the bike. An afternoon rum is usually awful for me anyway, and besides I would be putting both runs within 12hrs of each other.

Thurs morning rolled around, and I decided that awful as I felt, 15.5 was do-able. Then I'd just do 6.2 Friday, shifting the sessions by one day. This isn't a bad idea, as the schedule needs to shift to weekends anyway. I had company for the first 10 miles and that part of the run went great. I was distracted. But as soon as I struck out alone it all fell apart. The bottoms of my feet were hurting. My legs were tired. Then I started crying a little again. Not tearing, but choking up in the back of my throat. I decided to just head back to the parking lot, whatever the mileage ended up being.

When I reached 14.4, I was done. I knew I needed to walk (need to thank BBJM for that lesson!) a few minutes afterwards, so when the clock hit 2:15 I just stopped. And walked. I hurt. My legs were sore as if it was the first 15 miler of the season. This soreness and fatigue continued the rest of the day.

In retrospect, I can find a few potential sources of problems. My feet were hurting, so maybe I altered my stride a bit: New shoes. When I'm stressed, I don't drink much water: drink more water. I haven't been stretching much, although to have stretching be a problem at this point of the training is odd: try a little more stretching. I've been riding the tri bike more, it has a different fit: adapt slowly to that bike.

We'll see if the run gets in today. It might help to rest?