August has arrived. What else?

Monday RUN 2 miles 20 mins, tired. No commute
Tuesday RUN 1.4 and 1.4 and STRENGTH, COMMUTE? 

It's August, and I've been seeing August as a new start. I've had the summer with the kids and realized the long days have potential to do more. What were summers like before? 

Before - St Louis I guess- what did I do in my summer days? The afternoons I mean. The mornings, I know I "trained". My forced training. 2019 for Badger. 2018 for ?? I don't know. The evenings, though, what did I do?

Last summer doesn't count. Well it does, but I don't remember it. What did I do last summer? Surgery, recovery, Key West, new job. Why don't I remember? 

This summer, I've been able to set aside time most every night for something - biking, skateboarding, painting. I didn't do this before. What did I do before?

I made a list over the weekend of these things I'll keep doing, a list of primary and secondary (or better, evening and right before bed) stuff to do:

Primary: stained glass, strength training, painting, yardwork/dog/house, drawing, meal prep, overdue tasks

Secondary: watch a movie, read a book, a few minutes of PT/foam roll/flexibility, play with dog, drawing or painting.

It seems easy enough - come home around 5-6 and have dinner.  Have phone call 7-8pm. Ooh, and there it falls apart. That dividing line between available time and being able to use it. I supposed I can plan around 8-9pm? 

Yesterday was a long day. LA and I bickering over my stress dealing with my schedule. I woke up wanting to get my weekend run in - I switched this week from Tue/Thu/Weekend to Mon/Wed/Fri - and as I remembered it was now August and only two more months my mood soured as I realized my training for anything this fall is lost. Gone. Everything, it seemed.

I went for a 2 mile run, but everything hurt from my ankles and feet to a tight pressure in my chest. LA was texting me but I didn't read them. I hurt enough already. Home shower rush to leave. Work in a fog, dull and vague. Lunch break with LA and a serious conversation. Home with LA and another serious conversation. My main complaint - I'm always the one changing, I'm always the one being wrong, and I'm always the one sent for therapy to deal with problems. I'm begging for help, asking and changing and looking for it. And I feel lost without some guidance. We arrive home and LA immediately changes dinner to pre phone call only, and no going anywhere tonight, and bed by 9pm. 

To my surprise, this all worked. I was able to walk my dog during phone call at her pace (mosey), wash the dog, feed the hummingbirds, pick up the house a bit, cook rice and brats for meals, pack my lunch, take out recycling, and watercolor - all before 9pm!?!? Bed by 930 with some LA-time (melatonin helped). 

Up today at 4 or 430, I snooze in thinking about my failed PCR for genotyping while LA studies. I'm up, chores and dishes and feed dog, 6am I'm out for a run to the gym. Strength training (first time since May 5th?!), run home, shower, LA-time, and water color before leaving at 830. 

DAMN- productive!

How can I keep this going?!

See another post for another topic.