Multipolls surveys, to the point my eyes were tired. It was a perfect distraction in the end. A whole $0.75 or so of distraction. That's the reward. The price?
Well since I ate everything before LA was home, all I had was half of my cocoa yogurt (ate grapes mindlessly instead) but added berries anyway, he wanted to watch the Newhart show and I agreed. And potato chips. In the bowl of the yogurt. Like a sick sweet salty chocolate disgust. Then a sparkling water. And I'm sick. Too much, too fast, too gross, too fatty, too much. I insist on my 45 mins walk, even though I already know I failed. I was debating - do I keep going past day 8 and still end on my birthday? But I stuck it out, I'm glad I did, the goal is not to end a 75 on the birthday, the goal is to change.
On the walk I'm looking up local gyms, personal trainers. I've already tried this! (oh forgot the tsp spoonfuls of PB because I wanted fat, cry). Coach P. Noom. Loseit. Hamilton-almost.
Why do I think committing more $$ to something will make it any different? If I can't get myself to stop eating PB and PC, why do I think I'd go to a gym with what little time I do have?
I come home, frazzled, how can I change this? How to change the door to door to Moria?
Not by signing up with a personal trainer. Not yet.
1. Do a meditation in the car? A body scan?
2. Come home to immediately walk the dog, don't even enter the house.
3. Change clothes, body scan, don't even enter the rest of the house.
4. Have a super simple chore, stupid simple even.
4. Have a super simple chore, stupid simple even.
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