COMMUTE 9.2 miles
LOVING the Fear Inoculum mp3 I "stole" from the interwebs yesterday. Can you wearout an mp3 by overplaying it?
Rest day, and I'm feeling great still. The doldrums of the past week seem to be gone. I'm focusing on good sleep, resting, but after yesterday's run I feel like I've swung out of the post-race funk I was in. I don't think I waited too long to work out post race, I think I did it all correctly. But got caught up in the injury mentality of wondering about the hip and the heart and all else.
I'm realizing too that I'm still in denial about the heart attack. Maybe that's why it bothers me so much to be taking meds and having all these appointments reminding me of it. Weird as it sounds, one part of my brain still denies that I have anything 'wrong' with me. I just want to send a big middle finger FUCK YOU to everyone who doubts me, who doubts that I can do these races.
And subsequently I'm realizing that this is probably the driver behind me wanting to do these races. I also want to send a big middle finger FUCK YOU to the doubts in my own mind. Perhaps 100x more to me than to anyone else.
Planning my 28+15 for the weekend. Tomorrow out at Weldon Springs for the Hamburg and Katy. There will be walking, it's going to be hard to do, but I need to practice the sub 18 m/m pace I need for this race. And how to fuel for this? Same? Or less because I'm walking? Guess I'll find out.
I'm feeling great, hip/groin pain is pretty minor today. But my mid to lower back acts like it wants to spasm. Weeeeaaakk.
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