Was going to be a swim!

SWIM: 400y in 15 minutes (yes you read that right)
BIKE: 25.4 miles in 1:25

There is a timer at work, it looks like a freebie type of timer from a company. On it is the phrase "Time flies, and you are the pilot". Let's add that to another recent phrase heard at a group event: "We all have the same 24hrs, it's how you use those 24hrs". They are saying essentially the same thing--that your time is what you make of it, you are the pilot to your life, and any lack of time or extra time can be considered a stress or a benefit. At least that's how I see it. I tend to be on the "lack of time" side of the equation.

I don't go out much or take an afternoon off to visit a place like the botanical garderns. I don't watch TV, I don't read books or newspapers. Sometimes I flip through a magazine or the funnies while the coffee is brewing. I write to my training log and to this journal, otherwise my internet time is cut down to iPhone surfing over lunch. At least I'm stopping to eat lunch! I hear others talking about their free time and it seems a foreign concept right now. But I'm not jealous. Between the job, IM, and the house my time is overbooked. But the way I see it, I need to what I can, in the time I have, and not worry about the rest of it. One day at a time, one goal at a time, in a first-things-first manner.

That is how I ended up with a Wednesday schedule that ran me into the ground. Up early so as to be at work by 730am. I was going to swim, but I was too tired and short on sleep. All afternoon long I was falling asleep at my desk, even when someone was talking to me. I left around 330pm to get to the pool. Unmotivated, I promised myself to just at least get in the pool, then judge how I felt about it. I managed 8 sleepy laps before calling it quits. Just eight. I barely remember each lap, I just pushed off one wall and found myself at the other a few moments later. There was no way I was going to finish this, so I decided to head home for food and a nap. See even though I was tired, I still wanted to bike the Wed time trial tonight!

I had only 30-40 mins at home. I had a weird meal of sweet potato fries and basil pesto/ketchup (sugar and fat and salt, YUM). Tired as I was, I couldn't sleep so I sat in the kitchen in a brain dazeof thoughtlessness and confusion. I knew I couldn't stay awake for the 60 min drive to St Chuck, leaving me with no workout today or a local ride from home. I chose the latter, I'd already had Monday off.

Feeling more awake with some fuel in me, I set off for my Gravois route. Immediately I woke up (some credit to the hair-raising traffic on that road, wink and you're hit by a car) and although my legs didn't have a whole lot of ooomph I did aim for an ABP ride= Always Be Pushing. The outbound tends downhill before turning alond the RdP with some relatively flat stretches. This is what I needed--wind on my face, road flying by, heart pounding. Here is my drug, and soon enough I was feeling better.

But what a disappointing swim. It's weighing heavily on my mind, a plaque of doubt, a lesion of worry. Just what I need.

And so ends June. The first half of the year:
SWIM 87860y (49.9 miles) in 38.85 hours
BIKE 2249.12 miles in 132.18 hours
RUN 661.98 miles in 100.68 hours

Here comes July!