Short track run, pulled out a training plan for 2020

RUN 1.75 miles on track, no time or other data
BIKE 13.8 miles

GORGEOUS morning, as I'm biking to the track I see a runner ahead of me on the dark street. And I think, gawd this would be a great morning to run! Then I laugh as I realize - I'm on my way to a run.

Sunrise at 6:31, so BE and I ran a dark track for awhile. Again alternating walk/jog labs. I could definitely feel both the abdominal and adductor pains. Like a sharp ache. Ugh. Still haven't heard from the Dr about the MRI result. And it's not posted to MyChart yet, so I'm waiting. Not calling on it just yet.
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I'm still fatigued, just not as acute. And after the run today and last week (now I have a pattern) my lower back is tight and less flexy. wtf
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Tomorrow is 1 year! I've got ideas of how the next year will be different. But that's another topic for another place.

One goal for sure is to quit living in it. To quit defining myself by those limits and definitions. To quit thinking of myself as a heart attack victim/survivor who is living under restrictions and rules. Too fast, too soon, too much, too far, too cold or hot, too hilly or long, too this too that and you gotta keep your heart rate down, and you gotta take it easy, and you gotta take your meds and see the docs, don't eat this or that, and this whatever and that whatever and I just wanna say FUCK IT ALL.

Which is a funny thing to say, because I'm still deep in denial that it happened. I feel like it's a big joke played on me. Like people are just fucking with my head. Like life just wanted to give me a big ole middle finger and take what I love away from me.