Potato restart?

 This would be the 2nd restart due to potatoes, a few days ago (6 I think) it was chips. This time an after-8 made potatoes for Lev then I ate them type of fail. I felt sick afterwards. 

I haven't hit the restart switch yet, but I'm itching to. Do I like restarting or something? Am I so set on a "perfect" run that I'm willing to keep going back to day 1? Is this like the Monster habit of desiring to open something new? 

75 Days from today is April 2nd. 
I'm holding to the 108 Days of April 30th as still an overall goal. 

Yesterday we came home relatively early around 6pm, I stood in the kitchen still with my coat on eating turkey broccoli potato (craving the mustard and siracha). I wasn't really hungry, but I was in habit and in waiting, LA wanted to walk. But he's busy - not ready to walk, opening mail, etc. I end up eating a standing random M3. Walk. Anxious in walk about getting back after 8pm, because yesterday I managed to STOP as my walk ended at 8pm and nailed it, but today I didn't have my "fat" yet. Home to coconut milk with pumpkin and applesauce, then blueberries, neuf cheese, then coconut oil potatoes. FULL. So stupid full. I was there in kitchen until 925 ish, still anxious, and regretting. 

Sounds like a reset to me - total fail of goals. 

Restart. 

Reviewing a year ago - 1 year NoS, NoF

It was 18 fucking degrees out this morning so the walk with hill runs I'd planned turned into indoor yoga. Fucking hell, it will be high of 44 today, run then! With LA!

Late to work because I stopped to eat turkey, off plan, un measured, but I get so H during the day and that causes anxiety. I can log what I had, it was practically the planned dinner. So I'm OK. 

I just finished re-reading last year's posts, wow lots of problems and pain. Happily 1370 to about 1316. Unhappily the same problems. In one pre-post I listed all the noms, I could do the same for last night. A litany of noms, random, standing, unlogged, unmeasured. 

Unchanged. 

Stop this shit and change. 

It's already 30 degrees out. Sunny and nice! 

Day 4. Last night coulda shoulda been a restart? 

Breakaway Fail. Breakaway Again. Full Moon. 1 year NoS, NoF

My recent post about the Breakaway 10 Year Anniversary, turned out to be a fail day. Potato chips, twice, after 8pm. Anxiety about it, until I reset the app.

So I moved it to Saturday, my new Day 1. It was a Saturday that I restarted 10 years ago, so does it count?

Good so far, today being Day 3. We survived the snowstorm, also the day I failed and conveyor belted my way into a restart. 

1 year of NoS, NoF is tomorrow!!! No Rewards but think ahead to maybe a year from now being able to day - 1 year of Hard!

 What would that mean? Not a full year of full-on 75Hard Living, but rather a full year of not getting sick, not being too full, not being so distracted and unsatisfied, a year of having 3 M's and sitting and enjoying. A year of no regret. 

Ten years - Breakaway Bee

Is the 9th the Breakaway Day, or is the 10th? That day or the next morning? Does it matter. Still 10 years. 

And what a decade. Everything has changed. As much as I'd love to analyze and rethink, it really is all about the final changes I need to make am making and closing the gaps up on the meals thing. Everything else is so much more in order. Changed and in a good way. 

But the meals. The planning, thinking, thinking, thinking. So much mental energy still going here. Heck, my to do list for today is Meal Planning for next week. Morning, noon, night, and all in between. The thoughts are there. Is it getting better? 

Will I be back in another 10 years and say "gosh I still really need to make a change on this"? Gawd, I hope not. 

108 hard Week 1

 Saturday January 6th, 2025

108 hard Day 8

I'm changing this one to be a weekly summary. All good last week, but a rough one. My legs were swollen (water or ...?) and nothing seemed to fit. The post-holiday weight gain? Can't deny it, I was eating more. Potatoes, sweet potatoes, cheese at my sis, noms of cottage cheese, more more more. 

So while the first 7 days weren't perfect, I'm learning. Don't buy cottage cheese. Don't buy yummy low fat mayo. Don't buy baking cocoa. Pre-aliquot the yogurt. Prepack M3. Walk away from a bad choice because that's your last chance to be away from it. 

For this week, M3 fully prepacked except putting into a soup bowl and adding soup. M1 is premade I just measure and assemble. M2 prechopped and premeasured. 

Workouts all great, and getting the 3+ Fitness+ sessions. Which reminds me again to sign up for the yearly pass. Twice a day art going great. Reading more books, great. Water, love it. 

Something for Lev is going good. Something for Nova is undefined, but minor. 

Photo. Read. 45 mins. 45 mins. Gallon. Golden.

Meals. Jeezus fucking christ that's the theme of this blog. Solving the meal problem. Given a chance I'll blow it up. 

Last week was c-top turkey overfills. Multiple times sick feeling or way too full. 
So the goal this week is simple - follow the meal plan, 3 meals, 8a-8p, and under 1500.

Yesterday - so far so good but a squeak over 1500. And a bit after 8p. And 4-5 meals. 
Why do I say yesterday was good?!

108 Hard Day 4 Jan 2nd

 Thursday January 2nd, 2025

108 hard, Day 4

 -3 (or 2) meals and summary

1. 2 whites with mayo, 2 slices of turkey

2. oats - it's supposed going to be 800 as planned

3. soup with veg and turkey + extra turkey, grapes, prune, cottage cheese

-2 45' workouts

1. 20' min run that had maybe 5 mins hill walk, then walk

2. 45' walk, brisk

-Something for 

1. Lev am, he leaves today for MO :(

2. Nova - take her on your walk

-2 15' art

1. Print out the patterns needed for projects

2. Cut glass for the cockus

-What I read 

Finished the Noah chapter, loved it!

-Summary of the Day

All great until I get to Moria and You Shall Not Pass. I'm stuck, all my own fault. And I'm full and my 800 plans are shot. 

-Focus for tomorrow

Do an 800 tomorrow, and really prepack M3, not just say you're going to do it, or think that you'll be OK, or any other bullshit excuse you used today. 

108 Hard Day 3 Jan 1st

 Wednesday January 1st, 2025

108 Hard Day 3

 -3 (or 2) meals and summary

1. late noon M1 oats

2. then MORE at noon turkey veg NOM NOM and felt sick. 1000+

3. soup and veg and more standing turkey. Still not waiting

-2 45' workouts

1. Fitness+ upper and core

2. Whites Creek trail with LA and Nova

-Something for 

1. Lev am fun

2. Nova park walk, she loved it!

-2 15' art

1. SG project inventory

2. new paper and colors, urban style of mausoleum

-What I read 

JPB still in Noah

-Summary of the Day

I wanted to "take advantage" of the late M1, but then blew it the fuck up by eating M2+ at the same time. No excuse, stupid, and was almost throwing up after drinking water and on the walk. 

-Focus for tomorrow

Fix M3 you whiney shit